Ah yes, I remember this thread well. Maybe some context would help to clarify.
One the very first page, #8 (I'll call her this as that was the number of her first post in this thread) posted some strong opinions that included harsh criticism of seasoned nurses:
"Therapeutic lying" is absolutely inappropriate. It is unethical and in my opinion, it implies pure laziness on the Nurse's part. Telling the patient what you think 'they want to hear' does nothing for them therapeutically.
It's sad that so many Nurses just take the easy way out by 'pacifying' these people.
Did people jump all over her for these fighting words? No. She received many articulate responses urging her to consider the viewpoint of nurses who had many years of experience (she had none) dealing with this population. She also had a number of people try to explain where she was mistaken in her definitions and her approach. Her response was to continue to call the other nurses lazy and unethical. At one point, she stated that nurses who were trying to meet the dementia patients in their reality were just projecting their own feelings onto the patients. According to her, the patients needed to be reoriented to reality, even if it caused them great distress. She said that the resulting anguish could be therapeutic.
It took six or seven pages for any real impatience to show. The negative remarks you cited were addressed in short order by one of the mods, but I'm sure the posters who made them were voicing a frustration that others shared. It is unusual for someone with
no experience in a particular area to take such a rigid stance, complete with insults and accusations directed at those who tried to offer well-reasoned dissent.
I actually read through this entire thread (and have the headache to prove it), and what I saw were pages and pages and pages of good input, interesting acecdotes, links and citations of supporting data, kind and compassionate suggestions for caring for this vulnerable population, and even defense of #8.
I wonder why moderators don't put some sort of "kabosh" on people who repeatedly and personally attack people....not the IDEA, but the PERSON.....there is a distinct difference, but just like in most bullying situations, the onlookers tend to look the other way.....and I wonder why, when you have threads about lateral violence, and nurses bullying others, you allow that to happen here right under your eyeglasses, with nary a finger wag.
There were a
handful of snippy comments. These were met with moderator redirects, including the following:
Once again, I need to remind everyone that continued negativity toward [#8] will not be tolerated. State your opinion without referring to her in any way. Members who hold an unpopular opinion need to be prepared to hear plenty of dissenting reactions, BUT they do not need to be ridiculed, scolded, shamed, or spoken of in any other way that makes the discussion personal.
I think that qualifies as both a kibosh and a finger wag. Let me point out, too, that board discipline is a private matter. Members can be assessed points for inappropriate remarks and this is a matter that is between them and the staff.
It isn't bullying to challenge someone's thinking or to inquire about their experience level or to ask for supporting data. As they say on
Law & Order, this goes to credibility. In retrospect, I believe the other members behaved themselves pretty well, especially considering the way #8 repeatedly made insulting and accusatory statements. The few posts (less than 5%) that got snarky toward her were addressed very quickly.
There were far more considerate posts in this thread, including some that really tried to connect with #8. They might not have been as dramatic as the negative ones, but I think they are a better representation of the thread and the membership overall.
Would you like to comment?
