[brwneyegal]

Hello Everyone,

I just found out through the grape vine that I may be on the hit list of the "in crowd" click at work. Something about trying to make someone quit then trying to make me quit. I do not know how I should feel about this. I like my job. I work as a hospice nurse at a hospice center. The click are day shift nurses who think blankety blank blank. I really do not care about them. What I do care about are my patients and the girls I work with. We get along fine. What do you think?????? What should I do?????? I think I will keep on working my job until I find it unbearable to work here anymore then take my EXPERIENCE and go somewhere else!!!!!! What would you do??????

[TazziRN]

Until you get some kind of proof that this is happening, you can't do anything except be on your guard. If the girls on day shift have this much power, then it doesn't say much for management of this facility that they allow this to happen. All you can do is decide now what you will do if something does happen.

[HM2Viking]

Keep a diary at home about everything that happens in relationships with the other shift. This sounds like a form of bullying and the only way to fight back is to keep a critical incident log. (That said I would start looking for work. When you do your exit interview I would hand a copy of the diary of bullying behaviors over to the manager and let them know that the reason you looked for work was d/t a perceived hostile work environment.) Read up on workplace bullying and you will see the reasons for my suggestions.

[brwneyegal]

Right now I have no proof. No one has done anything to me unless I am just missing it. I do not think I am. I just got the scoop from one of the CAs who is up on the gossip. For now I am just going to do my job until I see some other behavior. Like I said I have not seen it yet.

[walk6miles]

First of all, what group of adults (besides women - meow) would engage in this childish and frankly silly behaviour.

Having said this, I wonder if a talk with the "upper management group" would help.

I am not sure I would let them run me off; I just get more stubborn. The only time I gave up on my job was during the bereavement period for my late parrents - I just didn't feel like fighting and the management wasn't about to suddenly get "smarter".

Kenny Rogers said it: "know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em". Good luck!

[rn/writer]

Keep your mind on your work and your patients. Be wary but not preoccupied. Be kind whenever you have the chance. Developing an offensive defense gives anyone who has it in for you the feeling that you have it coming. Kindness stands a far greater chance of disarming otherwise decent people who get caught up in the momentum.

Don't take it personally. It is very rarely about you. Usually, there is one person or maybe two, who have cracks in their character. Their tendency to make trouble gives them a perverse sense of power and the "victim" is incidental. If it wasn't you, it would be someone else. Others who are also shaky get pulled along in their wake.

Whenever possible, disengage. Do not be drawn into fights or arguments. Sidestep anything that seems to be an attack. Refuse to take offense. Doing so is the same thing as picking up the rope for a tug of war. The only way to win is not to play.

If someone points out a flaw, thank them for their concern and tell them you will consider what they have said. Seethe in private, if you must, but be gracious when it is least expected. If nothing else, you will surprise them.

Do, as someone else suggested, keep notes of anything that seems amiss, but do not show your emotions (other than pleasant ones) at work.

These things are simple but not always easy. If you are a spiritual person, trust God to provide protection for you. If he wants you in this job, no one can take it from you. If he wants you elsewhere, there is no place better to be.

When you are free to refrain from jumping into a fight, you can think better and be more alert to what is truly going on around you. When you don't have an axe to grind, this lack of malice shows in your attitude.

Be as wise as a serpent and as harmless as a dove. You patients need you.

I wish you well.

[Daytonite]

I find it hard to believe that you "get along fine" with the girls you work with. Obviously, one of these "fine" people brought this news to you that you are on a "hit list". The whole idea is just childish. What kind of "fine" person is that? People who go around repeating gossip, particularly to the people who are the target of gossip are troublemakers and helping to promote the gossip. If no one had told you of this, you wouldn't be worried about it and continue to go on working and minding your own affairs and those of your patients, wouldn't you? Now, someone has got you all worked up--probably over nothing. Think about it. Just how in the world can nurses sabotage you to get you fired? If you are following the rules of your organization and doing nursing by the book, what can they possibly do to get you fired? Meddle with your time card? Hide charts on you so you can't finish your charting? Tell the DON that you called her a nasty name behind her back?

Loose lips sink ships.

[bellcollector]

I have to respectfully disagree with daytonite. It has been my experience that some nurses can be the most petty, nasty, spiteful and devious creatures on earth. They can and often do find ways to set people up, have seen it happen. I am more inclined to agree with rn/writer don't take the bait but do cover your arse always. Be the best than you can be but be aware that not everyone has the patients or your best interests at heart. Keep your focus on your patients just be a diary keeper and you will be just fine.

[catnip]

Do your job the best you can, do what you know to be right, and let karma deal with the rest.

[all4schwa]

Well Said

Originally Posted by rn/writer

Keep your mind on your work and your patients. Be wary but not preoccupied. Be kind whenever you have the chance. Developing an offensive defense gives anyone who has it in for you the feeling that you have it coming. Kindness stands a far greater chance of disarming otherwise decent people who get caught up in the momentum.

Don't take it personally. It is very rarely about you. Usually, there is one person or maybe two, who have cracks in their character. Their tendency to make trouble gives them a perverse sense of power and the "victim" is incidental. If it wasn't you, it would be someone else. Others who are also shaky get pulled along in their wake.

Whenever possible, disengage. Do not be drawn into fights or arguments. Sidestep anything that seems to be an attack. Refuse to take offense. Doing so is the same thing as picking up the rope for a tug of war. The only way to win is not to play.

If someone points out a flaw, thank them for their concern and tell them you will consider what they have said. Seethe in private, if you must, but be gracious when it is least expected. If nothing else, you will surprise them.

Do, as someone else suggested, keep notes of anything that seems amiss, but do not show your emotions (other than pleasant ones) at work.

These things are simple but not always easy. If you are a spiritual person, trust God to provide protection for you. If he wants you in this job, no one can take it from you. If he wants you elsewhere, there is no place better to be.

When you are free to refrain from jumping into a fight, you can think better and be more alert to what is truly going on around you. When you don't have an axe to grind, this lack of malice shows in your attitude.

Be as wise as a serpent and as harmless as a dove. You patients need you.

I wish you well.