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by joylyn

Updated Mar 20, 2008 at 12:50 PM by sirI

I have recently been stood down from my nursing position following untrue allegations made by a relative about me...Funnily enough the patient never ever said anything negative about me in front of me when the relative was in my presence...quite the opposite, always saying how kind i was and how well he was cared for by me....i was verbally abused by this person one night and filled in an incident report which the unit manager refused to respond to....some 2 weeks later there was a letter of complaint with numerous false allegations made about me and i was stood down...i am now expected to return to work as if nothing has happened, but am now suffering from depression, anxiety and stress....i feel i can never go back to nursing,,, IM DEVASTATED,

[aeauooo]

Re: untrue allegations

What do you mean by "stood down?"

How well were the allegations investigated? Was your reprimand based only on the complaint from the family member? How well was your response to the allegations received by your manager?

I ask this because I have worked with some very good managers and some very weak and even destructive managers. IMO, a manager who gives a knee-jerk response to every complaint is weak. A good manager will take the time to hear all sides of the story and respond in a measured, appropriate way.

Take a deep breath, go back to work, this too shall pass. It happens - it sucks, but some of the most valuable lessons we learn are the most painful. There will come a time when something like this will happen again and you'll be ready to duck!

James 1:2-4

[nyapa]

Re: untrue allegations

I would be totally devastated as well. (((Hugs)))

Have you gone higher up the ladder? Explained that you filled an incident form out that you don't think was followed up? Do American nurses have other agencies to help them with unfair dismissal? I have no idea of the employment rights of ppl in your country

I figure what you need to do first is look after yourself. You matter. You need to recognise it. It must be so hard when you have received such a personal attack not only on your performance but also on yourself as an individual.

Try talking to a counselor. These ppl are great, they help you build up your self confidence BUT more importantly show you ways to see things more clearly, and develop coping and problemsolving strategies. Many may have linkups with agencies that can help you with financial concerns, and perhaps even link you up to organisations that can help you with fixing this unfair situation? Give it a go

[sharlynn]

Re: untrue allegations

I have the same questionas aeauooo (who had very good advice, by the way). Is stood down the same as being fired?
I'm confused, because you wouldn't be going back to face anyone then.

[zamboni]

Re: untrue allegations

Originally Posted by sharlynn

I have the same questionas aeauooo (who had very good advice, by the way). Is stood down the same as being fired?
I'm confused, because you wouldn't be going back to face anyone then.

Probably means suspended. Just a guess...

[NRSKarenRN]

Re: untrue allegations

Does your employer have an employee asssistance program (EAP)?
I'd ask them for counseling over job stress.....most offer phone assistance and 1-3 free counseling sessions.

[ShayRN]

Re: untrue allegations

I understand your frustration. Seems to me your manager needs a backbone. (((HUGS)))

Once, I was in charge on my old unit. We had just gotten out of report and I heard a woman say, Can I ask who is in charge, please? I turned around with a smile on my face and said, I am how can I help you? SHE WENT OFF ON ME! Called me a stupid "B_tch" Lazy Fat a--, told me I had no business calling myself a nurse. Here was me Turns out, she had put her grandfather's call light 45 minutes earlier (before I was even at work) and nobody had gone in to put grandpa on the bed pan. He had since been incont of BM. I was physically threatened at one point when she said "I am gonna come over this counter and beat the &*^% out of you" (sounds like duck and truck, lol) Anyway, I never said ONE word to her. I turned around called security to come to the floor to deal with her. Then I grabbed the closest aide and had her come with me to clean him up. This particular aide as it turns out was the one ignoring the call light. Ofcourse, all these doctors who are so big and bad when dealing with nurses put their heads down in the charts and pretended like they didn't hear the crazy lady at the nurse's station. Luckily I reported the incident to my manager the next day. One might think this was the end of the story, right? WRONG!

About 2 weeks letter, my manager got a note from the higher ups with a copy of a letter from the crazy lady. It said that I would not answer her grandfather's call light and that when she complained about it, I started cussing her out and in retaliation for the complaint, security was called to remover her from the floor. Then, to top it all off, she complimented the aide BY NAME who was in reality the one walking by the blinking light for 45 minutes. Luckily, my NM knew what kind of nurse I am and did one of these She sent a letter with her documentation from the night I reported it and I never heard another word.

[aeauooo]

Re: untrue allegations

Originally Posted by ShayRN

I was physically threatened at one point when she said "I am gonna come over this counter and beat the &*^% out of you" [...] I turned around called security to come to the floor to deal with her.

Absolutely, 100% the correct thing to do!

Assault of health care workers is a serious problem and threats are not to be taken lightly.

[CHATSDALE]

Re: untrue allegations

have to repeat question, were you fired or suspended
either way you need your side of the story in your personal file
half finished thing wind up there and when they surface years later no one really can remember what went on at any particular time
write down an answer for each charge
do not allow this to deaffect you if it does find another job