[SCRN1]

What are some of the craziest things you have seen that patients' stupidity have caused themselves? Here's a few I have taken care of:

1. Patient with a fungal infection in his brain. Cause: snorting cocaine.

2. Patient with knee infection cultured to reveal E. coli. She had knee surgery and after being discharged, she wanted back in the hospital for stronger narcotics. So, she rubbed feces in the wound knowing it would cause infection. Yep, she actually admitted to this...after being confronted with lab results.

3. Patient whose with occupation as a stripper. A man, claiming to be able to safely inject saline into the breasts of the strippers for a cheap breast enhancement. The patient ended up with a nasty infection and ended up losing a breast. The doctor had to do reconstruction in several phases. In trying to save the nipple, he attached it to the abdomen until the final surgery, where it was put back where it belonged.

[nursebrandie28]

I had a patient get a roll of cookie dough stuck in his anal opening. That would be an interesting triage assessment. He had to be one embarrassed man!!

I also had a patient who took viagra at 7pm on him and and his wife's 50th wedding aniversary, at 10pm he is in the ER because his erection would not go down.....

I had a patient who tried to cut off a callus/corn off of her big toe, nearly cut her toe off, had to get several stitches

[spiceyqueen]

remember i once did a placement in a gastro-surgical ward. had this prisoner who was in for among other things inserting a pair of glasses in his anus, eating blanket. his endoscopy was the most fascinating i have ever seen, his gastric contents....oh man
he was shuckled to bed and all, but some how he managed to take his IVC out from his wrist and insert it into his penis. RN went to prepare antibiotic, got caught up for about 15 minutes with a doc, Guards were standing at the door, one was seating in the chair reading a mag. RN walks in notices a bit of blood on the bed sheet when he asked to flush his canulla, finds it missing, guy doesnt say anything, swears like ****, and required a search.when he finally needed to pee, he said ( very clamly, as if, he was talking about the next golf game)he has a cannulla in his penis, and it need to get out before he takes a leak...

two weeks later, same dude, brought in with plastic spoon, and bits of his hair in his anus.

[DutchgirlRN]

I see patients in their homes who are diabetic, toes or feet rotting off, they claim to be compliant with their diet and medication but you see nothing but junk food and regular cokes sitting around and they live alone. One told me she checks her BS 3-4 x per day. Where's your monitor so I can check it now? Um....I actually don't have one. No wonder she's lost 2 toes already and are now working on a foot. States diet compliant but weighs well over 200 pounds. Frustrating!!!

[fultzymom]

I currently have a 37 year old at my nursing home (yes 37!!) et she is diabetic. She has severe diabetic gastroparesis (or so we were told). She has a abdominal hernia so huge it looks like something is going to explode out of it! BS are crazy out of control. But she would always check it herself et say a normal level. For instance, one morning she told me it was 150. Then about 1 hour later lab called with her labs et it was 516!! They had been drawn right before she told me her morning glucose. Come to find out that the patient uses her diabetes et bulemia to control her weight!! (Finally told to us by a family member.) Then she got a sore on her foot et would not let us get her to the podiatrist. You guessed it, three surgeries later she has had the first two bones in her toe taken out et part of the last bone removed. Doc is trying to save it for her so that she actually has a toe! The doctor told her she could do the dressing changes et when nurses were asking to see it she would say, "I just changed it," or "I'll come et get you when I am going to change it." And she would never let them see it. Well, finally one of the night nurses walked in when she was cleaning it. And it was turning black et red AGAIN!! She was not going to tell anyone! I might mention that patient also receives 2mg of Dilaudid Q 4HR IVP et Phenergan 50mg Q 4HR IVP due to her pain et nausea from the "diabetic gastroparesis." Would self-medicate when she was at home with whatever she could get her hands on (also finally told to us by family). WHAT A MESS!! And she has been in a nursing home for 1 1/2 years.!!

[DutchgirlRN]

Originally Posted by fultzymom

I currently have a 37 year old at my nursing home (yes 37!!) et she is diabetic. She has severe diabetic gastroparesis (or so we were told). She has a abdominal hernia so huge it looks like something is going to explode out of it! BS are crazy out of control. But she would always check it herself et say a normal level. For instance, one morning she told me it was 150. Then about 1 hour later lab called with her labs et it was 516!! They had been drawn right before she told me her morning glucose. Come to find out that the patient uses her diabetes et bulemia to control her weight!! (Finally told to us by a family member.) Then she got a sore on her foot et would not let us get her to the podiatrist. You guessed it, three surgeries later she has had the first two bones in her toe taken out et part of the last bone removed. Doc is trying to save it for her so that she actually has a toe! The doctor told her she could do the dressing changes et when nurses were asking to see it she would say, "I just changed it," or "I'll come et get you when I am going to change it." And she would never let them see it. Well, finally one of the night nurses walked in when she was cleaning it. And it was turning black et red AGAIN!! She was not going to tell anyone! I might mention that patient also receives 2mg of Dilaudid Q 4HR IVP et Phenergan 50mg Q 4HR IVP due to her pain et nausea from the "diabetic gastroparesis." Would self-medicate when she was at home with whatever she could get her hands on (also finally told to us by family). WH
AT A MESS!! And she has been in a nursing home for 1 1/2 years.!!

How utterly sad...sounds like she could use a good shrink as well as meds.

[JentheRN05]

Fultzy - I believe we have taken care of the same patient, except I took care of her in a hospital after a surgery removing (can't remember) how many toes! It's sad when someone cares so little about themselves as to not take care of themselves.
In fact, I had an instructor who was very clear (she said it to us) that she was NOT a compliant diabetic. Needless to say, she's been in the hospital more this year than she is teaching - or so I'm told.

[Cattitude]

Once on med-surg, i had a female inmate who would swallow anything at all to be able to stay in the hospital. We did our best to remove things from th room but she found ways.
She manged to swallow a tiny shampoo bottle on my watch, ouch!

Now in home care, plenty of STUPID things. I walked in one guys apt and he had a big plate of CRACK sitting on his bed!!! Nice, huh?

Oh the non compliant diabetics with their fairy tale BG's!!! You start to wonder when every single visit their level is 125. Oh yea? the same number 4 visits in a row??

One other guy used to mix a few beers occasionally at night with about 10-15 dilaudid. And they were 8 MG pills!!!! He had the tolerance of an elephant.

Another lady with lots of self caused infections. E Coli lots of times from having a foley and sitting in her own poop at home even though she was NOT incontinent. She just didn't feel like getting on the toilet and preferred to use a diaper??? And she's only 57.

I could go on for hours

[EDValerieRN]

I had a guy once who had an itch in his rectum, and so naturally he scratched it with a steak knife. Ended up with a colostomy bag and some psych care.

[lupin]

I had a guy once who had an itch in his rectum, and so naturally he scratched it with a steak knife.Heee heee, well what else would you scratch it with?

Just finished taking care of a 23yr old male this week who is a quad because his family found him lying on the kitchen floor with blunt force trauma to his head and neck. They were afraid he had been taking drugs so they didn't take him to the hospital until the next day so his drugs could get out of his system.
Took care of a holy terror of a woman who got drunk and ran her car head on into another guy's. She had two broken legs, he ended up dying. She was such a b**** to her family and the staff that we called psych in. When her family asked why she was treating everyone this way she said "Cuz I deserve it." Hope she likes the room service in prison now.
Guy was up on our floor this past summer with priaprism (erection longer than 4 hrs) after taking a handful of trazadone and doing a couple lines of coke. He would walk up and down the hallway with these itty bitty shorts on and would proudly pull down the shorts to show all the nurses why he was in the hospital. He was also on Dilaudid 2mg every hour which he asked for constantly (flippin' residents).