[oddfanatic]

let's say you got accepted to two hospitals and you want to work at one more than the other, and you've already formed a relationship with the one that you don't want to work to....

what are the proper manners for that? do you send a thank you letter?
and if so, what do you write on the letter?

clueless.

[miss arron]

i would call HR and let them know you appreciate the offer but have accepted another position...

don't need to go into too much detail more than that

[santhony44]

I would probably follow the phone call with a letter.

All you need to say is thank you for your offer but I have accepted an offer elsewhere. No need to give your reasons.

[mauxtav8r]

Ditto. Less said about reasons the better. It's a small world and anything can get back to anyone.

Besides, it is no one's business but yours as to the why.

[caliotter3]

I also agree with the other posts. Additionally, you don't even have to say you accepted another position. You can send a short letter stating you regret that you are no longer available for that position, thank them for their consideration, and leave it at that.

[llg]

I would say a little more, but not much -- particularly if you have actually formed a relationship with someone. I would probably speak with them verbally, but also write a short note. However, I would be careful not to say anything that would jeopardize my relationship with that person. Who knows? You might want that job someday.

I would say something like:

Thank you for the time and effort you spent on my application for the _______ position. While it sounds like a wonderful opportunity, I don't believe it is the right one for me at this time in my life. I have therefore decided to decline your offer. I hope that our paths cross again someday. It was a pleasure to meet you.

Sincerly,
llg

If they were to contact me and ask me whether I had accepted another position, I would be honest -- but very kind in my assessment of their job that I had declined.

[susancoyotesfan]

I am so glad I found this topic!

I have a related question: I applied at three hospitals for the same position; I now have interviews with all three in the coming 10 days.

My question is this: how does one gracefully keep from committing to one until all three interviews/offers are done?

What I mean to say is, my first choice position is the last interview. I don't want to turn down a perfectly good job at a place I could happily work if my first choice position doesn't work out, however!

[llg]

Originally Posted by susancoyotesfan

I am so glad I found this topic!

I have a related question: I applied at three hospitals for the same position; I now have interviews with all three in the coming 10 days.

My question is this: how does one gracefully keep from committing to one until all three interviews/offers are done?

What I mean to say is, my first choice position is the last interview. I don't want to turn down a perfectly good job at a place I could happily work if my first choice position doesn't work out, however!

Be polite and explain that you need a little time to think it over. If they dig for more information, simply say that you are looking at a couple of other jobs -- and believe that you need to look at them so that you will be able to make a committment without second-guessing yourself later. Arrange to stay in touch and don't keep them hanging a moment longer than you have to. If they force you to make a decision before you are ready, you will simply have to make a tough choice and live with the consequences.

Another tactic is to try to re-schedule your first 2 meeting so that they occur AFTER that of your first choice -- or at least only a day or two before. Call them up a few days ahead of time and explain that something has come up and you need to reschedule. You don't have to tell them what that is -- but you might want to have a good little white lie prepared just in case you need it. I think that is the approach I would probably take. Delay those first meetings a little and give yourself a better chance of not being caught in the dilemma you fear.

Good luck!

[mauxtav8r]

There are some "scripts" I try to keep in my head during job interviews --- this one goes like this...

"I'll be thinking about this over the weekend (or over this week). Is it alright if I call you next Monday with my decision?"

That way you set your final decision date up front and you build in time to see all your other prospects. Also, if you have a spouse or other person to consider, you can alter your response to "I'll be discussing this with my wife/husband over the weekend." Nobody would expect you to fire off an acceptance without thinking it over.


If you were applying for a job on the grill at McDonalds they'd expect you to give an answer at the interview, but you are a professional. Convey that with your measured, calculated response.

[Agnus]

Originally Posted by susancoyotesfan

I am so glad I found this topic!

I have a related question: I applied at three hospitals for the same position; I now have interviews with all three in the coming 10 days.

My question is this: how does one gracefully keep from committing to one until all three interviews/offers are done?

What I mean to say is, my first choice position is the last interview. I don't want to turn down a perfectly good job at a place I could happily work if my first choice position doesn't work out, however!

You know you are not the only candidate they are considering. They would not hesitate to tell you they need time to make a decision.

Please, understand you are on equal footing with the facility. In other words if you are at all interest in working for this place tell them. Thank them for their time and tell them what (only if positive) your feelings are about this job. Tell them that you have several more interviews and that to be fair you want to attend all of them before you make your final decision.

Then ask them if you may have x amonut of time. If they are even remotely interested in hiring you they will agree.

If your last interview is on say Tue. ask if you can have till Fri. This give you time to weigh your options without pressure and without the emotions of the last interview clouding your decision. This make allowance if the interview must be delayed.

It is unlikely the first interview will require an immediate decision because it is unlikely they will make an immediate decision themselves.