[tobimikal]

Sounds like your dads not that bad. just a little stubborn. Arent we all!! people his age grew up in the depression and they tend to still have habits from that. Most of them never throw anything away until you throw it away for them and they save money anywhere they can, even if it is only 2 cents. This is the way he was raised and theres nothing wrong with that. There are extreme cases however, I knew a lady that was always hiding her old briefs and trying to rinse them out, hang dry , and reuse ( Yuckkkk).

[pattycakeRN]

I guess I was raised to be careful with what I put into my body. What's the harm in throwing away something and buying fresh (meds, food, etc.) to be sure it's fresh? I don't care whether syrup experts (must be a delicious job though...) think syrup lasts X long. I would rather just toss it- better safe than sorry. Plus I don't like the thought of eating old, yucky things. Sometimes older people frustrate me to no end...

[multicollinearity]

I think the Great Depression never leaves our elderly, and it still affects the OP's father, most likely. Hunger and lack impact people for decades. It did my grandfather. After his last stroke, at the age of 80, he began 'dumpster-diving' for food. The entire family was mortified. With his dementia, nobody could convince him he had all the food he needed.

[Noryn]

I dont think he is dumb at all. Older people honestly used to frustrate the other word for heck out of me after I graduated mainly because they did everything wrong according to experts or books. I am coming to find out that the elderly for the most part are much smarter than I ever gave them credit for mainly because they have never lost sight of common sense. I will go so far as to say they are much smarter than I am or anyone I know in the younger generation.

He is 80 years old, able to cook pancakes so he is doing something right. Despite how advanced we think we are, these older people at our age on average were healthier and didnt waste like we do. They also didnt depend on the government as much to tell them something was safe and could see past money making propaganda.

If you ever research expired drug danger it is comical how out of hand it is. Back in the 60s I think 2 people developed fanconi's syndrome. From what I have read they could not find out the exact cause so stated it had to be expired tetracycline. So are expired drugs harmful? Absolutely that is if you are talking about profits, but harmful to health--not so much.

[prmenrs]

There's a happy medium out there somewhere. My 84 y/o mom has a real sensitive gi tract, so she gets a little ocd about putting a piece of masking tape w/the date on canned goods & frozen leftovers, and tossing anything questionable. I do check her vitamins and OTC's--she's not as good about checking those.

Treasure your dad--sure wish mine were here!

[luvschoolnursing]

Originally Posted by banditrn

Wait until you have to convince some elderly person that 'Vicks' isn't the cure all for everything!

Vicks ISN'T the cure all for everything!?!?!?

[rn/writer]

Wonder what would happen if you mixed Vick's and Windex?

[SusanKathleen]

Oh, I love this thread! What wonderful thoughts and memories of my parents and my in-laws!

My father-in-law, who lived with us for 7 or 8 years, died a year and a half ago. When we were cleaning his room..........oh my gosh!! The stuff he saved. The most interesting thing we found was a shoebox FULL of (cooked) bacon in the cupboard under the bathroom sink. Whenever we'd go out for breakfast, usually on weekends, he'd order the bacon, but never ate it. Wrapped it in a paper napkin (wouldn't take a box from the waitress- he liked that greasy old napkin), and took it home for his doggie. Some of it may have been a year old or more. Apparently it didn't hurt the dog, although he died soon after Dad did.

[rph3664]

Originally Posted by rn/writer

Wonder what would happen if you mixed Vick's and Windex?

You get WD-40.



No, seriously, I have heard of people spraying that on arthritic joints, and they swear it works.

[nursing is a joke]

The bottom line is; the fact that he is 80 makes him wiser than anyone you'll ever meet (unless they are around his age). It is the young people, like me at 45, who would be "dumb" if we didn't open our ears and listen to what these wise, older people have to say to us. Does he have dementia or does he have all his faculties? Are you considering this when you interact with him?

I am a male nurse. And males have egoes - big ones. We are hard to control. That's just a fact of life and because he is 80 does not change that.

In my opinion, you have every right to tell your dad what you want your children to eat or not eat. And you can, without anger, put your foot down (they are your children after all). But to belittle him in the process is just going to make him angry.

As a nurse, it burns me up to see how old people are treated these days....... especially in Long Term home care. Can you imagine being 75 years old and having all your faculties........... and someone who is 20 years old is treating you like a child and directing every aspect of your life? Why do you think old people refuse to take their medicine? Because it is the ONLY thing they have controll over in their lives - keeping their mouths closed. You have to be patient with older people. They do everythig slow....... including gathering their thoughts. Give your dad a break.

I entered a room once where the Aid and a Nurse were arguing with an old man with dementia. The Patient was very very aggitated. I asked the nurse and aid to leave the room so I can talk to the elderly patient. Then I asked, "What is upsetting you?"
The patient told me " I'm angry because those idiots who were just in here are telling me I'm seeing things." So I asked, " Can you point to me what it is they are telling you isn't there?" And he said, "That waterfall right there." And I said, " You mean the one comming out of the picture?" Then he says (with enthusiasm) "YES that one!" Then I said, "Well, I don't know what those two are talking about, but that is just about the most beautiful waterfall I've ever seen."

Then the old man smiled at me and said, "That's what I was trying to show them........ it is beautiful isn't it?" And I say, " Yes, I agree, it sure is beautiful. Can you hear it too?"

And he said, "Yes, it's one of my favorite sounds." And I said, "I could fall asleep listening to a waterfall...........it's like listening to the ocean don't you think?"

He said, "Yes, it's peacefull."

Now the man is calm and happy. I ask him if there's anything I can do for him. And he says, "No, I'm going to go to sleep."

Sometime you have to put being "right" aside and just enter their world. In most cases it works better than any medicine you can give them.

As far as orienting them.............. do that after you calm them down by being in their world with them for a little while. In many cases there is a small part of the mind that is still "there". And when you tell them they are seeing things......... the part of the mind that is "there" gets upset.

No old people = no young people..........give them all a break.

JR