[Sammi15]

Graduate Nurses vs Experienced Nurses

1. A Graduate Nurse throws up when the patient does.
An experienced nurse calls housekeeping when a patient throws up.

2. A Graduate Nurse has so many pins on their name badge you can't read it.
An experienced nurse doesn't wear a name badge for liability reasons.

3. A Graduate Nurse charts too much.
An experienced nurse doesn't chart enough.

4. A Graduate Nurse loves to run to codes.
An experienced nurse makes graduate nurses run to codes.

5. A Graduate Nurse wants everyone to know they are a nurse.
An experienced nurse doesn't want anyone to know they are a nurse.

6. A Graduate Nurse keeps detailed notes on a pad.
An experienced nurse writes on the back of their hand, paper scraps, napkins, etc.

7. A Graduate Nurse will spend all day trying to reorient a patient.
An experienced nurse will chart the patient is disoriented and restrain them

8. A Graduate Nurse can hear a beeping I-med at 50 yards.
An experienced nurse can't hear any alarms at any distance.

9. A Graduate Nurse loves to hear abnormal heart and breath sounds.
An experienced nurse doesn't want to know about them unless the patient is symptomatic.

10. A Graduate Nurse spends 2 hours giving a patient a bath.
An experienced nurse lets the CNA give the patient a bath.

11. A Graduate Nurse thinks people respect Nurses.
An experienced nurse knows everybody blames everything on the nurse.

12. A Graduate Nurse looks for blood on a bandage hoping they will get to change it.
An experienced nurse knows a little blood never hurt anybody.

13. A Graduate Nurse looks for a chance "to work with the family"
An experienced nurse avoids the family.

14. A Graduate Nurse expects meds and supplies to be delivered on time.
An experienced nurse expects them to never be delivered at all.

15. A Graduate Nurse will spend days bladder training an incontinent patient.
An experienced nurse will insert a Foley catheter.

16. A Graduate Nurse always answers their phone.
An experienced nurse checks their caller ID before answering the phone.

17. A Graduate Nurse thinks psych patients are interesting.
An experienced nurse thinks psych patients are crazy.

18. A Graduate Nurse carries reference books in their bag.
An experienced nurse carries magazines, lunch, and some "cough syrup" in their bag.

19. A Graduate Nurse doesn't find this funny.
An experienced nurse does.

Hope you enjoy it!

[dorimar]

yeah, it WAS funny, until you hit on the restraints, the alarms, the abnormal assessment, the avoidance of famiily.... Then it just sounded like your were talking about uncaring people. I may be experienced and even burnt out, but i'm not THERE yet. I still care about my patients. I think that's why I'm so tired and burnt.

[ZASHAGALKA]

This, or something like it, has been posted before. And, new nurses certainly did NOT think it was funny to be the butt of the joke.

So duck, cause here it comes. . .

~faith,
Timothy.

[christymwinn]

I have seen this before but I still like it. It is humerous, lighten up! It isn't meant to be literal!!!
Thanks Sammi!

Christine

[gymjunkie]

This has been around for a while. It's on the nursing humor forum. It makes experienced nurses sound uncaring.

[Sammi15]

I don't mean to offend anyone feeling . I didn't post it to insult anyone. I thought it's CUTE and we all need a good laugh once in awhile.

[multicollinearity]

I identify with the experienced nurse and I'm only a student. What does that mean?

Oh - and for the uptight, lighten up. It's a bit of satire and humor.

[Tweety]

Originally Posted by Sammi15

I don't mean to offend anyone feeling . I didn't post it to insult anyone. I thought it's CUTE and we all need a good laugh once in awhile.

It can turn into a flamefest because it makes experienced nurses seem uncaring and new grads silly. Then the posts will follow with "it's only a joke people! Lighten up! Get a life." (Looking back someone already said "lighten up" LOL)

In fact I think that happened when someone posted it before.

You just have to respect that what you get a chuckle out of isn't funny to everyone and don't feel bad about that.

You can't win. But don't worry, I'm sure a mod will be here soon to move it or lock it.

[Tweety]

Originally Posted by multicollinarity

Oh - and for the uptight, lighten up. It's a bit of satire and humor.

It's not for you to decide what people decide humorous. That is based on our lives and experiences as intelligent adults to decide. If you think it's funny that's o.k. but it's disrespectful to tell those who don't think it's funny to "lighten up".

Jokes are kind of like music, what one person thinks is good music, another person can think of as dreadful noise.

Respect.

[multicollinearity]

Originally Posted by Tweety

It's not for you to decide what people decide humorous. That is based on our lives and experiences as intelligent adults to decide. If you think it's funny that's o.k. but it's disrespectful to tell those who don't think it's funny to "lighten up".

Jokes are kind of like music, what one person thinks is good music, another person can think of as dreadful noise.

Respect.

I am too serious 99% of the time. Occasionally someone reminds me to lighten up. And I do. I don't think that is a bad thing.

Perhaps it's helpful to not read the list above literally, but rather with kernals of truth buried in there that can make us laugh.