[aloevera]

I can't imagine you being told "you'll never make it"...like I said before there is always one bad apple, the trick is to not let her spoil the entire bunch...Us older nurses are valued where I work, we do have more experience..,.that is a fact....we train new nurses frequently, I rather enjoy handing off knowledge that I have gained thru experience and most new nurses respect that and listen but there, too, there is always that one bad apple that already "knows it all and will do it her way regardless".....just a fact of life.....in every profession

[SoundofMusic]

In my very short time as a nurse, I've sort of picked up on the fact that many who are the most nasty at work seem to also live seemingly miserable or empty lives at home. I'm sort of a quiet observer type, and I hear a lot of what they discuss at work, etc. -- always talking about all the bills they have, something bad that happened on the off days, or they're divorced x5 or whatever -- I mean, it sort of falls into a pattern for me and I can start to see it. We younger new nurses are sometimes of vicitim of someone who cannot compartmentalize their life the way they should -- so they take it out on whomever gets in their way.

The nicer folks on the other hand, tend to talk as if they have lives, friends, and happiness of some kind outside of their job. Maybe it's not always this way, but I'm starting to see the patterns and qualities of both types.

And it's everywhere, not just in nursing -- but it seems to stick out more as we rely so much on these folks to teach us.

[SoundofMusic]

I can't imagine you being told "you'll never make it"...like I said before there is always one bad apple, the trick is to not let her spoil the entire bunch...

I was told in my early days in an ICU by a nurse that she "would hate to be my patient." Here I was with about 4 weeks of experience ... such a sweetheart. I've since left that unit ....

[elizabeth8503RN]

Originally Posted by jenniferj

As a student nurse, I have had the privilege of working with some wonderful nurses, who have really helped me to feel confident and supported. My guess is that most nurses are generally nice people who occasionally have bad days. Unfortunately for me, I have also run into the kind who anonymously call one's instructor to report things that never even happened as absolute fact. And they are nurses; why would they lie? So obviously I must be lying. Also had the misfortune of running into an adjunct instructor who had never taught before, hadn't been oriented to the units, didn't know how the computer system worked, couldn't read the pumps, and couldn't explain how to write a care plan. After five weeks of asking her questions, she finally exploded at me "what's your problem!?". I told her I wanted her to teach me the same material the students in the other clinicals were getting, so I would be on the same page they were the next semester. She started personally attacking me, I started crying. We hadn't been assigned patients yet, so I told her I needed to go home. Big mistake. Next day, I was no longer a nursing student. Kicked me out for abandoning my (imaginary) patient. I know I'm not perfect, and I rub people the wrong way sometimes. But they took a 3.95 GPA student, who writes great care plans and has good clinical skills, as well as excellent theraputic communication skills, 40 years old with 6 children, trying to escape an abusive husband, and tossed me in the trash. I didn't get to say a word in my defense, and there is no recourse at my school - the Nursing department can do whatever it wants. So now I am a nursing student in search of a school. I know that most of the nurses who visit this forum are really decent, hard-working, caring individuals. I have been reading your posts for quite a while now. But I do believe that some nurses "eat their young". I have watched my class as they have picked us off one by one - seven out of twenty-seven so far - and only one of them really couldn't wrap her mind around the way a nurse needs to think. It seems to me that nursing is a profession where, if we don't all hang together, we will all hang separately. How do you go about changing the climate so that people will want to and be able to become nurses and stay actively nursing? That is the question that truly needs to be answered.

I was the youngest in my class (I was 17 when I started the program and turned 18 a couple of weeks into the program) of about 100 in my LPN class. My clinical instructor was in the mind frame that no one my age should even be in nursing. She made it very difficult for me in clinicals. I had three clinicals. Each clinical rotation was divided into thirds. Each third of my clinicals my clinical instructor (who wasn't my main instructor) stated that I was doing better each time, but stated that I needed to improve on some things (well duh.....I was 18 and had no skills as a professional......but I also acted alot more mature than most of my classmates). At the end of my third clinical my main clinical instructor flunked me...she stated that I had not improved at all in my clinicals. She all but stated that I wasn't worth teaching, that I was too young, and that I shouldn't be a nurse at all. She made me feel that I wasn't woth teaching when she told me that day. I had walked across the stage, gotten my LPN pin, and two days later, I found out that I didn't pass my final clinical. I felt like my mentor stabbed me in the back......Yeah I know that I am young, but don't insult my intelligence.

[nanacarol]

I apoligize for such unprofessional behavior. Each nursing school has to be accredited by some regional board and if enough students follow correct procedure, i.e., documenting the conversations between oneself and the instructor, keep copies of the syllabus, and follow it, even students have recourse. The scenario you described is totally unacceptable. New instructors are also evaluated. I really wouldn't let this go. Oh, State nursing boards also certify nursing programs. nanacarol

[linzz]

Thanks nancarol for your post, wish there were more out there like you. I had to deal with at least one nasty person at almost every clinical site as did my classmates. Anyways last night, I was talking to my spouse and he said that he and his guys were giving the student the gears and I asked him why he did that and he said "It's just a rite of passage". My spouse is in engineering/trades work area. I tried to explain to him that he should be the one to stop doing it but it fell on deaf ears. I wish I could say that nursing is different.

[nanacarol]

Linzz, it has to do withhow comfortable we are with our pathway. If we know we are secure in ourselves we won't need to cause pain to others and rights of passage will cease as will nurse to nurse hostility.
thanks for the acknowledgement. nanacarol

[HardWorknNurse]

yes, yes and yes. The unfortunate thing is that I don't think a lot of nurses realize how much us younger nurses look to the more experienced ones with loads of respect, experience, wisdom, and the list goes on. We can all learn so much from eachother, but especially us from the wiser ones. I hope this aspect of the nursing career will improve because I have been ( or witnessed) discouraged, dismissed, and disregarded by quite a few older nurses, for no reason other than being young. And I by no means am stereotyping or saying all nurses do this, but to say that nurses do not eat their young is fiction.

[Tweety]

Originally Posted by HardWorknNurse

I by no means am stereotyping or saying all nurses do this, but to say that nurses do not eat their young is fiction.

I am by no means saying that there aren't nurses that eat their young. Would you say it's the predmoninant behavior of experienced and older nurses? Taking all the nurses you encounter in a day, is it the predominant behavior to brand the entire profession as a profession that eats their young?

Being a new grad at any age is tough and sometimes demoralizing. Even with the support of mentors, and never being eaten, I had a rough time with the ratios, the sick patients, the paperwork, and the overwhelming amount of work, having a huge load after orientation and being on my own. So perhaps we are a profession that eats their young. It just seems a nasty thing to say to those of us who are older in age and experience and in the trenches. It demoralizes me as an experience person who has precepted countless new grads and students to hear someone say "yeah, nurses eat their young.....".

Anyway, that's my issue. Thanks for listening.

[Grrrr!]

In this place that I just finished an assignment You would be trying to give your report and the b--ch would be interupting with an attitude from hell.

I'm only on page 5 of this thread, but when I read this one, I cracked up laughing! My sisters are RN's, too (there are 4 of us) and one of them told me that when the above happens to her, she says to the nurse, "Here is a cup of 'Shut-The-Hell-Up!' Sip on that while I finish giving you report!" Bwahahahah!