[LPN & EMT-CT]

Originally posted by rnkim
ANYONE EVER DIAL A 9 BEFORE YOUR PHONE NUMBER AT HOME>>
THAN WONDER WHY ITS NOT DIALING??
TO MUCH TIME AT WORK, LOL

I've done that more times than you can think about.
David

[chrisrob]

i always thought the only way to hem anything was with mocropre is there another way?

[Bloke]

[AmAnRN]

here's one:

"There's a new body in the morgue. Its a nurse."
"how do you know its a nurse?"
"Well, she had a full bladder, an empty stomach and her butt was chewed out!"

[Youda]

. . . you clean your toilet with disposable exam gloves.
. . . you know what CYA and PIA mean.
. . . when you ask the doctor for Xanax for your patient, and when he says no, you ask if he'll give you a script for it instead.
. . . you start listening to your dog's breath sounds on hands and knees with a stethoscope when it coughs.
. . . when you look deep into someone's eyes, you're not being romantic, you're checking the color of the sclera and for PEERL.
. . . your idea of a neat Christmas present is a new pen light.
. . . when someone asks you what you want for Christmas, you tell them you need white cotton underpants.
. . . you get excited at Walmart when they have a color of ankle socks that match some of your scrubs.
. . . you don't have any evening wear unless it ties with a string at your waist.
. . . when you try on a new pair of dress slacks at a swank dress shop, the first thing you do is bend down to see if the seams will tear out in the butt when you're emptying a foley catheter bag, then look at your butt in the mirror to see if your underware shows through the fabric.
. . . when your boyfriend is watching football and you hear them in a huddle saying 10-12-18-14, HIKE! You wonder if you remembered to sign the narcotic count sheet.
. . . you hear yourself asking your boyfriend what color his pee is, for ANY reason.
. . .you go to a sushi bar and wonder what kind of microbes are growing on the fish.
. . . when you feel your teeth get gummy, you don't brush your teeth because you worry about bad breath, but because you know you're growing mass quantities of strep.
. . .when the faucet is leaking, you begin to calculate the flow rate.
. . .you think alcohol gel in your purse is as essential as tampons.
. . .you've ever used an ABD pad with safety pins (or silk tape) during any menses.
. . .you SAY "mensus" instead of "period" or "that time."
. . .you caught yourself seeing how long you can hold your breath to avoid airborne pathogens or smells.
. . .you make your bed at home with hospital corners and smooth out all the wrinkles.
. . .you caught yourself just after kissing someone and smelling alcohol on their breath wondering if s/he was a diabetic.
. . .you silently disapprove when you see a razor in the trashcan instead of a sharps container, at home.
. . .you visit a friend in the hospital who just delivered a baby and you want to know where her fundus is.
. . .you bring that friend a breast pump instead of flowers.
. . .then you visit the nursey to see the newborn and knock on the viewing glass to check the startle reflex.
and finally, you might be a nurse if you've ever turned around to check the color of your own BM before flushing.

[adrienurse]

OMG Youda! So true!!!!!

[NewfieRoseRN]

Originally posted by Jamesdotter
I dunno--I was on a plane last month when the man in the next seat, apropos of nothing, turned to me and asked "Are you a nurse?" "Why do you ask?" "You look like one (!!)"

So, does that mean you can tell a nurse because you LOOK like one?

I was at the hairdressers this evening and she said "you're a nurse, aren't you?" When I asked her how she knew, she said "Nurses can never make appointments because they are always getting called in to work. When they make appointments, they miss them, anyway, so they usually just drop in and hope for the best...like you did"

Who knew we were so obvious??

[boggle]

.....You write the "will pick Mary up for a doctors appointment at 1350" note to the kids school using military time....the school's office had to call you because they can't figure out when you are coming.

Your kids ask for "guiafenessin" for their cough (hey, generics are cheaper!).


love this thread!

[nrw350]

I think this thread is fast approaching perhaps the longest thread on allnurses.com

Nick

[karenG]

ever watched a nurse pour a drink? we always hold the glass at eye level!

and why do we all such dirty laughs???? a group of us were sitting in the college refrectory, which was full of non-nursing students, we were telling tales and laughing. got asked to leave 'cos we were disturbing the students. poor mites, think we were shocking them!!

Karen