Today we mourn the passing of an old friend
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Today we mourn the passing of an old friend, by the name of Common Sense.
Common Sense lived a long life but died recently in the United States.
No one really knows how old he was, since his birth records were long ago
lost in bureaucratic red tape.
He selflessly devoted his life to service in schools, hospitals, homes, and
factories helping folks get jobs done without fanfare and foolishness.
For decades, petty rules, silly laws, and frivolous lawsuits held no power
over
Common Sense. He was credited with cultivating such valued lessons as to
know when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm, and
that life isn't always fair.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more
than you earn), reliable parenting strategies (the adults are in charge, not
the kids), and it's okay to come in second. A veteran of the Industrial
Revolution, the Great Depression, and the Technological Revolution, Common
Sense survived cultural and educational trends including body piercing,
whole language, and "new math." But his health declined when he became
infected with the "If-it-only-helps-one-person-it's-worth-it" virus. In
recent decades his waning strength proved no match for the ravages of well
intentioned but overbearing regulations.
He watched in pain as good people became ruled by self-seeking lawyers.
His health rapidly deteriorated when schools endlessly implemented
zero-tolerance policies. Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual
harassment for kissing a classmate, a teen suspended for taking a swig of
mouthwash after lunch, and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly
student only worsened his condition.
It declined even further when schools had to get parental consent to
administer aspirin to a student but could not inform the parent when a
female student was pregnant or wanted an abortion.
Finally, Common Sense lost his will to live as the Ten Commandments became
contraband, criminals received better treatment than victims, and federal
judges stuck their noses in everything from the Boy Scouts to professional
sports. Finally, when people, too stupid to realize that a steaming cup of
coffee was hot, were awarded a huge settlement, Common Sense threw in the
towel.
As the end neared, Common Sense drifted in and out of logic but was kept
informed of developments regarding questionable regulations such as those
for low flow toilets, rocking chairs, and stepladders.
Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife
Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is
survived by two step siblings: My Rights, and Ima Whiner.
Not many attended his funeral because so few realized that Common Sense was
gone.
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