[Nurse2B2005]

I'm hoping to bump this thread up - during our pinning ceremony, we are going to give a thank you speech to instructors. We thought we would make it on a lighter note by sharing things they forgot to teach us in nursing school that we had to figure out during our preceptorship. We were able to brainstorm a few, but I'd love some more input from you all. Thanks in advance!!!

[grace90]

Sometimes when I have a quiet moment at work I wonder just what the h*** I learned in nursing school anyway... I run into so much stuff that I feel like I know nothing about. I learn something new everyday, such as...

how much pain medicine a young female patient with abdominal pain can have on board before the patient down the hall doesn't hear her yelling anymore

how far you can hold a phone from your ear and still hear that arrogant doctor yelling

not to talk on the phone while giving IV push meds

that the doctor you paged 4 times in the last 2 hours that STILL hasn't called back WILL call back as soon as you start a catheterization, sterile dressing change or code brown clean-up

that intestinal fistulas stink

just how bad GI bleeds stink

I know there's a lot more but I can't think of 'em right now!

[DutchgirlRN]

What I didn't learn in Nursing School is that I would become the neighborhood doctor. I hate that !!!! The first time it happened to me I was 6 months pregnant and my neighbor came in with her child and said "does this look like german measles to you". YIKES ! Get out of my house !!!!

[Jessy_RN]

Originally Posted by Debbie_LPN

Here's a couple more after my night at work tonight:

How not to laugh when an escapee gets his/her wheelchair stuck in a muddy ditch across the street.

How not to laugh when a resident says "I'm going home" and another resident in a wheelchair yells "You stupid a**, you're not going anywhere! You're stuck in this hole like the rest of us"(while 3 family members walk by)!

Not to turn red when a patient who is pleasuring himself moans and says inappropriate things while his roomate is staring at him.

AND FINALLY MY FAVORITE:
They do not teach you what to do if a combative resident hits another resident in the head with her cane and says "That'll knock some sense in ya!".

ROTFL

[CseMgr1]

How many times I was told as a student L.P.N. that following graduation we would not have ANYTHING to do with IV's, other than count the drip rate and report it to the Charge Nurse...only to wind up starting IV's, mixing IVABX and hanging piggybacks....not to mention giving an occasional IV Lasix to patients in full CHF.... because the only R.N. in the house was tied up with two simultaneous codes. Welcome to the REAL world, folks!

[ZASHAGALKA]

Well I for one learned that I can handle a lot more things thrown at me at once than I ever thought possible.

I've learned that sometimes people die, no matter what we do to them.

I've learned that sometimes people live, no matter what we do to them.

I've learned to act like I know strangers that come up to me at wal-mart and say, 'Remember, you took care of my dad, 7 yrs ago!'.

I've learned that the first thing to do in an emergency is to take MY OWN PULSE.

I've learned to judge the character of my co-workers by how long in the day they wait to give MOM in relationship to MY shift.

I've learned that, many times, 'be nice' is my mantra to some coworkers.

I've learned never to say "I'm bored" or "It's slow".

I've learned that vented patients want to watch on TV basically whatever you want to watch.

I've learned that anger and denial are the first two stages of grief and to never underestimate the lengths to which some family members will go to embrace those stages.

I've learned that there are distinct advantages to being allowed to die gracefully.

I've learned that, regarding supervisors and family members, if it felt good saying it, it was probably the wrong thing to say.

I've learned that there is a direct relationship to how much of an ER co-pay you have to pay and what exactly constitutes an emergency.

I've learned that my interpersonal skills are my most often used skills.

I've learned that family members that 'are going to complain to management' have often complained about so many people that they lost credibility 10 complaints ago - and so I do the right thing and don't consider the consequences.

I've learned to say "NO, THANKS AGAIN FOR OFFERING, THOUGH" after the 3rd call begging me to come in to work when I wasn't up to coming. And this, btw, SHOULD be taught in school.

I've learned that there is a direct relationship between how often an administrator shows up in the trenches to how good an administrator they truly are. (my first DON only showed up 1 a year - to promote the Combined Federal Campaign. When I saw her on the floor, I'd comment, 'Oh, it must be CFC time again).

I've learned that managers that show up for work in uniform are better clinical allies that those that show up in suits.

I've learned to keep a jar of mentholatum jelly in my locker (a smear up each nostril blocks out all kinds of smells).

I'll try to think of more later.

~faith,
Timothy.

[Don*]

Originally Posted by ZASHAGALKA

Well I for one learned that I can handle a lot more things thrown at me at once than I ever thought possible.

I've learned that sometimes people die, no matter what we do to them.

I've learned that sometimes people live, no matter what we do to them.

I've learned to act like I know strangers that come up to me at wal-mart and say, 'Remember, you took care of my dad, 7 yrs ago!'.

I've learned that the first thing to do in an emergency is to take MY OWN PULSE.

I've learned to judge the character of my co-workers by how long in the day they wait to give MOM in relationship to MY shift.

I've learned that, many times, 'be nice' is my mantra to some coworkers.

I've learned never to say "I'm bored" or "It's slow".

I've learned that vented patients want to watch on TV basically whatever you want to watch.

I've learned that anger and denial are the first two stages of grief and to never underestimate the lengths to which some family members will go to embrace those stages.

I've learned that there are distinct advantages to being allowed to die gracefully.

I've learned that, regarding supervisors and family members, if it felt good saying it, it was probably the wrong thing to say.

I've learned that there is a direct relationship to how much of an ER co-pay you have to pay and what exactly constitutes an emergency.

I've learned that my interpersonal skills are my most often used skills.

I've learned that family members that 'are going to complain to management' have often complained about so many people that they lost credibility 10 complaints ago - and so I do the right thing and don't consider the consequences.

I've learned to say "NO, THANKS AGAIN FOR OFFERING, THOUGH" after the 3rd call begging me to come in to work when I wasn't up to coming. And this, btw, SHOULD be taught in school.

I've learned that there is a direct relationship between how often an administrator shows up in the trenches to how good an administrator they truly are. (my first DON only showed up 1 a year - to promote the Combined Federal Campaign. When I saw her on the floor, I'd comment, 'Oh, it must be CFC time again).

I've learned that managers that show up for work in uniform are better clinical allies that those that show up in suits.

I've learned to keep a jar of mentholatum jelly in my locker (a smear up each nostril blocks out all kinds of smells).

I'll try to think of more later.

~faith,
Timothy.

Wow. Excellent post. I hope to remember these in my years as a student and after graduation in beginning practice.

[talaxandra]

Good observations, Timothy!
I've learned that the one time you dismiss your wolf-crying patient's reports they really do have something wrong this time...
... but every time you think there might be something wrong there isn't.
I've learned that the most frail looking old people have the tightest grips, and aren't afraid to grab at any of your body parts
I've learned that feeling something wet on my leg, even if I'm showering a patient, is not a good thing
And finally - for now - I've learned to drink that water/take that toilet break/devour that sandwich now, because there won't be time later

[CseMgr1]

Originally Posted by ZASHAGALKA

I've learned that family members that 'are going to complain to management' have often complained about so many people that they lost credibility 10 complaints ago - and so I do the right thing and don't consider the consequences.

Yeppers. My late father used to refer to these people as "crackpots". Just get out of our way, and let us take care of Mom and Pop, OK? Sheesh....

[ZASHAGALKA]

Let me add while I'm thinking about it:

I've learned that, just the reverse of cars that never make 'that' noise for the mechanic, no matter how many times my patient denies chest pain overnight, the moment the doc or day shift nurse comes into the room, patients will pipe up "my chest has been hurting ALL NIGHT!"

And let me name this one Timothy's Razor: "If something goes wrong with a patient, it'll tend to go wrong JUST after I gave report and said it was fine."

~faith,
Timothy.