[momcat107]

Are you sure you dont ride along with me? I do homecare for hospice and I have come out of a home and had three cows licking my car. I have had far too many close encounter with,deer,foxes,raccoon you name it. I hit and killed a wild turkey. I have had countless calls when the weather is at its worst,That momma wont wake up.So you brave the elements,almost wrap your car around a tree,and when you get to the house you find momma will never wake up again,and rigor has begun to set in. or you arrive at home for the first time,knock on the door,and you hear I am coming,then thud.LOL on the floor behind the door. you call EMS,and end up having to break a window to get in....need I go on...

[Franemtnurse]

That even though they are only able to walk with a shuffle, and have severe illnesses, some elderly men are able to get an erection without Viagara.

That old men pee in their sinks

That very old men still get infatuated with their young nurses.

[NurseRatched67]

1. That ALOT of women poop while delivering a baby vaginally...and have no idea until the wafting smell makes it their way. Followed by complete silence in the delivery room.

2. That Nurses are some of the only people who can use emesis basins (new, clean ones) to eat their lunch or birthday cake out of.

3. Using a new plastic bedpan as a birthday cake mold is really funny.

4. That putting your face anywhere in arms length of a actively laboring patient who does not have an epidural.....is never a good idea.

5. That people's butts are really "pimply".

6. That cancer patients can sometimes have a wicked sense of humor.
(pt playing scrabble..."tits and ass" were words on the board.

7. That women who don't wear socks with shoes have feet that stink more then their crotches. (remember this ladies, in the summer, if you are having your pap done!)

8. That being called "dear" or "honey" by the 80 year old man is actual endearing and not sexual. Calling him "troublemaker" in reponse is also endearing.

9. Doctors who are patients are the biggest babies.

10. When starting your first IV, don't wear white pants or scrubs.

[lourain]

That just when you think you've seen everything that will gross you out, you find a patient eating his foot skin (I'm talking from ball of the foot to the heel, not just a tiny piece!)

[Daywalker]

YUCK!!!

[donster]

Originally Posted by lourain

That just when you think you've seen everything that will gross you out, you find a patient eating his foot skin (I'm talking from ball of the foot to the heel, not just a tiny piece!)

OK, then.

Ewww.

Ick.

Gonna hurl.

Huwaaaahhhh!

[trmr]

That even though surgeons put in those handy little things called staples after an abdominal surgery, they can all pop off with a nice little "zipping" sound and all the bloated insides can pop out to the outside, if you make the patient gag while inserting their NG!!!!!!! Oh what fun!!!!

[MeeshellRN]

That was great!
I'm a new grad RN and I already found myself shaking my head and saying "yep."

I needed a good laugh today--Thanks!

[xviii-xxv]

* That it is actually possible for people to sleep while standing...

* That we will need wrestling to pin a combative pt.hehe esp during labor

*How not to barf in front of a pt smudged with poop, flying loogie, pus...etc

* That its actually possible to think of ur next meal while cleaning up all these and have the appetite to eat and even throw a party
* That its possible for a 200 lb grown up male to faint seeing a drop of his blood, and u are the only one to catch him and ure only 100 lbs.

* That doctors are much of an ass, but nurses are more of an ass than doctors...


xviii-xxv

[littlepeach]

Breastmilk can and will squirt you in the eye!