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Funny things that pts say



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  #71  
Old Jul 02, 2008, 06:37 PM
Registered User
Join Date: Jul 2008
Re: Funny things that pts say

I work in TBI and SCI, so needless to say I have my share of confused patients. Add nightshift to the mix and things really heat up!
I asked a lady who sent her the flowers, and she said, "My husband and his wife".
I had a guy who thought his closet was a fridge full of pizza coupons, and we had to hurry before they ran out of pizza.
How about the guy that thought his urinal was full of coffee? You can imagine how that played out!
We had one that thought they were part of the staff, and would try to access the med room to pass meds. He would wander and try to give peas to patients....I guess he thought they were meds! What topped it off was we had a CNA that had been peed on that day, so she had changed into a gown and drawstring pants. The other patients were moreso confused when two "patients" would enter their rooms and try to work! hahaha!

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  #72  
Old Jul 02, 2008, 09:03 PM
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Join Date: Jul 2008
Re: Funny things that pts say

Originally Posted by Nurse Salt View Post
I was working in a 6 bed ward one night two men were VERY confused and restrained for their safety. Well, all night they they were "talking" to each other but not having the same conversation! One was talking about his home being burglarized and the other was laying cement somewhere... But they were going back and forth responding to each other as if they were old friends! Anyway, as this went on at one point one of them mentioned being tied down and the other one goes, "I'm tied down too... When you get out come over here and untie me!" Then they went straight back into their "conversation." The other nurse and I were trying so hard not to laugh but when that happened we couldn't help it!
lolololol

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  #73  
Old Jul 04, 2008, 09:49 AM
alcrab01 (Female)
Registered User
Join Date: Jun 2008
Re: Funny things that pts say

I love alcohol withdrawal patients. They never fail to keep me laughing. One night, I had an old man who was a pill! I ended up having to put him in 4-point restraints. Despite my efforts, he still tried to escape. Sitting at the nurse's station, I could see him doing sit-ups, trying to get the restraints loose. I yelled, "Hey, I can see you!" He said, "I see you too! Quit being so nosy!"

Later on, I almost peed in my pants.. He had been quiet for awhile and I was hoping that he had fallen asleep. All of a sudden I heard him call out, "Can anyone hear me?!?! Help! I'm tied up! Follow the sound of my voice!" Hahaha that still cracks me up!

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  #74  
Old Jul 04, 2008, 03:55 PM
sbenning5 (Female)
Registered User
Join Date: Jun 2008
Re: Funny things that pts say

Originally Posted by alcrab01 View Post
I love alcohol withdrawal patients. They never fail to keep me laughing. One night, I had an old man who was a pill! I ended up having to put him in 4-point restraints. Despite my efforts, he still tried to escape. Sitting at the nurse's station, I could see him doing sit-ups, trying to get the restraints loose. I yelled, "Hey, I can see you!" He said, "I see you too! Quit being so nosy!"

Later on, I almost peed in my pants.. He had been quiet for awhile and I was hoping that he had fallen asleep. All of a sudden I heard him call out, "Can anyone hear me?!?! Help! I'm tied up! Follow the sound of my voice!" Hahaha that still cracks me up!



That's hilarious!!

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  #75  
Old Jul 04, 2008, 08:53 PM
NY-SN_Kay (Female)
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Re: Funny things that pts say

Originally Posted by alcrab01 View Post
I love alcohol withdrawal patients. They never fail to keep me laughing. One night, I had an old man who was a pill! I ended up having to put him in 4-point restraints. Despite my efforts, he still tried to escape. Sitting at the nurse's station, I could see him doing sit-ups, trying to get the restraints loose. I yelled, "Hey, I can see you!" He said, "I see you too! Quit being so nosy!"

Later on, I almost peed in my pants.. He had been quiet for awhile and I was hoping that he had fallen asleep. All of a sudden I heard him call out, "Can anyone hear me?!?! Help! I'm tied up! Follow the sound of my voice!" Hahaha that still cracks me up!

LMAO!! Oh my that is tooo funny!

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  #76  
Old Jul 05, 2008, 12:40 AM
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Join Date: Jul 2005
Re: Funny things that pts say

I had a pt. in a semi-private room who needed frequent neuro checks. So I tried to speak softly so the roommate wouldn't be disturbed. I asked my pt. can you tell me your name? And he slowly stated "My name is...Earl" All of a sudden I hear a hearty laugh from the roommate. And yes, it was my pts' name. Cute.

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  #77  
Old Jul 05, 2008, 11:49 PM
Registered User
Join Date: May 2008
Re: Funny things that pts say

Originally Posted by NY-SN_Kay View Post
LMAO!! Oh my that is tooo funny!


i would have had to go around the corner to laugh

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  #78  
Old Jul 08, 2008, 08:19 PM
JaredCNA (Male)
Registered User
Join Date: Jan 2007
Re: Funny things that pts say

Last night I moved a very combative (and very confused) pt up in bed. He apparently thought we jerked him up in bed really hard, and he got in my face and told me that next time he would shake a salt shaker in my face if I wasn't more gentle.


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  #79  
Old Jul 08, 2008, 10:08 PM
TLCinCICU (Male)
Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2008
Re: Funny things that pts say

I have a great aunt who had already experienced laryngeal cancer and lives with a tracheostomy. Surprisingly enough, she can speak at the level of a harsh whisper. Years afterward, she had a lump appear in a breast. On the morning of her surgery, her surgeon was discussing her options. "Mrs. C, if the report from pathology comes back as cancer, do you want us to go ahead and remove the breast?" Her reply, "Sure. I just have one question. Can you take the one that's left and shift it to the center so I won't be off balance?" You gotta love her sense of humor...

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  #80  
Old Jul 08, 2008, 10:17 PM
Jessiedog (Female)
Registered User
Join Date: Nov 2007
Re: Funny things that pts say

Originally Posted by nursebabygirl 08 View Post
oh boy!!!
Yes,....I found the funniest thing about nursing children wasn't always the children, but the dumb questions the parents asked.

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