[NOIRLINCOLN]

Originally Posted by PTU2SLP

I had a BS degree and still opted to do the ADN first because I felt it was a better program and also had more clinical time. I went back a year later for my BSN at another college and had very little trouble since I was familiar with the routine. I am now finishing my MSN. I think if she wants to be a nurse it doesn't really matter what avenue she takes, because she has to do what she believes is best for her. Speaking as a veteran parent, if you really can't afford for her to do the BSN, encourage her to do it and tell her that your program would probably be too tough for her...she'll be in your program the next week!

Yes, that was the real crux of the matter. I do remember those days. Well now she has a (4) yr scholarship so she can do whatever she wants to do. I am not going to encourage her to do something that she does not want to do. My brother is currently advising her to go into engineering??? I told her that I refuse to play "tug of war". This escalated into my brother promoting engineering, and my promoting nursing. I told her "this is my stop, this is where I get off"! All of her college credits thus far are the pre-requisites for nursing. She tells me that she now feels like she has wasted her time b/c she wants to be a medical doctor. Yes, I have told her that this requires at least (8) years of non-stop study. Yes, I told her that she can not do anything w/ a neuroscience degree. She will not be trained to work in the work-world w/ a neuroscience degree, and what if she has to/or choses to exit education at the bs neuroscience level, or before??? I am just going to focus on my studies, and I'll be here if she needs me.

[chris_at_lucas_RN]

Originally Posted by NOIRLINCOLN

Yes, that was the real crux of the matter. I do remember those days. Well now she has a (4) yr scholarship so she can do whatever she wants to do. I am not going to encourage her to do something that she does not want to do. My brother is currently advising her to go into engineering??? I told her that I refuse to play "tug of war". This escalated into my brother promoting engineering, and my promoting nursing. I told her "this is my stop, this is where I get off"! All of her college credits thus far are the pre-requisites for nursing. She tells me that she now feels like she has wasted her time b/c she wants to be a medical doctor. Yes, I have told her that this requires at least (8) years of non-stop study. Yes, I told her that she can not do anything w/ a neuroscience degree. She will not be trained to work in the work-world w/ a neuroscience degree, and what if she has to/or choses to exit education at the bs neuroscience level, or before??? I am just going to focus on my studies, and I'll be here if she needs me.

I usually try to edit out the stuff I'm not responding to directly, but ya know, it's all pertinent to what I have to say.

1) You must be a spectacular mother to have raised a child who can not only get a four year scholarship, but who has so many choices and cares enough about herself and her life to put so much thought into it. Well done!!!

2) It's so hard not to get pulled in when you have something in your heart you want to give to your child, isn't it? I think, now that my children are past that part (as am I!), that it has something to do with letting go of them once the job is done.

3) Tell your child that nothing done well is ever wasted, whether it is schooling, work, raising a child, or whatever, even if it appears to have delayed an important goal. Everything can be a positive contribution on the ultimate end--who we are and what we do.

If in ten years she is a nurse or a physician or an engineer, she'll be great at what she does and she may wind up changing courses and that's fine too.

I am so glad that she got the scholarship. I know money was an issue (geez, for whom is it not?). I am happy for you both!

[SMK1]

Your daughter is at the perfect age and in the perfect set of circumstances to pursue a degree in medicine if that is truly her desire. What i would do as a mom is arrange for her to shadow a couple of doctors and shadow a couple of nurses. See if any Med students are available for an interview (if you live near a teaching hospital or med school.) If there is a lag time between starting college, perhaps she can get a 6 week emt or CNA cert and work with these people to see what they actually do. If she wants medicine as a career, there is no better time for her to pursue it, and for her to win a 4 yr scholarship tells me that she is a motivated, intelligent and capable young lady. If she already has her nursing prereqs done, then she already has another plan in place, if she decides she wants nursing instead.

[arciedee]

Originally Posted by NOIRLINCOLN

Yes, that was the real crux of the matter. I do remember those days. Well now she has a (4) yr scholarship so she can do whatever she wants to do. I am not going to encourage her to do something that she does not want to do. My brother is currently advising her to go into engineering??? I told her that I refuse to play "tug of war". This escalated into my brother promoting engineering, and my promoting nursing. I told her "this is my stop, this is where I get off"! All of her college credits thus far are the pre-requisites for nursing. She tells me that she now feels like she has wasted her time b/c she wants to be a medical doctor. Yes, I have told her that this requires at least (8) years of non-stop study. Yes, I told her that she can not do anything w/ a neuroscience degree. She will not be trained to work in the work-world w/ a neuroscience degree, and what if she has to/or choses to exit education at the bs neuroscience level, or before??? I am just going to focus on my studies, and I'll be here if she needs me.

Perhaps as a graduate of a liberal arts school I'm more than a little biased, but it is NOT necessary to major in an easily identifiable "trade" in order to be successful in the work world. I myself currently work for a mutual fund company with people who have majored in history, philosophy, math (me), psychology, etc. We don't automatically screen out resumes if they don't list "accounting" or "business management" as a major. A neuroscience major, or any other major for that matter, is not going to be the career kiss of death should she decide not go directly on to medical school. I have college friends who were bio and/or neuroscience majors and went on to become doctors and nurses, but more went on to become researchers, biotech and pharmaceutical QC analysts, technical consultants, business analysts, to name a few. And it is not requisite that she major in neuroscience if she does think she wants to go to med school. You can complete the med school science pre-reqs but be a German major if that's what really gets you going (I know a current med student who did just that!). There's a lot to be said for being "well-rounded," as cliched as that sounds, in all industries. She should explore her options and choose what feels best for HER.

You have obviously raised a very intelligent and motivated young lady who is entirely capable of making up her own mind. I'd encourage you to simply be supportive and try to keep your judgements to yourself (unless she is planning to do something that could seriously harm herself or others, of course). The world is her oyster and she will have many experiences to learn and grow from during her college career and they will not all center around the classroom. She'll probably change her mind a few times and the end result may not be what you, or even she, pictures right now, but she will do just fine. Allow yourself to just be proud of her, you deserve it!

[Cay]

Let her go Mom. She is doing the right thing. Those classes are what many of us took to get in an ADN program or are trying to get in one! Encourage her and praise her for her goals and be proud and supportative of her. Sounds like you have a great daughter.

[Dr. Grace Brown]

Originally Posted by LilPeanut

It's her life and her decision. She might change her mind, she might not; but in the end, it's her choice to make. You pushing is only going to convince her to follow her own path.

My mom always thought I'd be a great nurse, but when it came time to go to college, I chose to study spanish and international studies. She didn't hassle me at all. Now, I'm going back for another degree and she's being my cheerleader.

Even if it is the wrong choice, it's hers to make and the experience of being away from home and in the dorms and trying to make it on her own might be very good for her. The experience and maturity she could get from that are potentially very valuable to any career, including nursing.

I am totallyfor the BSN path. YOur daughter is RIGHT. The fast way is not the best way. We are trying to work in a profession that is increasingly complex and needs the best minds. If she is going to succeed she has to start with the baccalaureate degree in nursing.

[Cay]

If the course required were known to me when my interest in nursing began I would not have gone for the ADN. The young need to go for their dream when they can as then their Doctorate. Thanks Doctor!

[HappyNurse2005]

If she is going to succeed she has to start with the baccalaureate degree in nursing.

oh, so us ADN students aren't going to succeed? shucks.

[NOIRLINCOLN]

Originally Posted by RNinMay2005

oh, so us ADN students aren't going to succeed? shucks.

Yes, my sentiments exactly! I decided just to drift off this segment b/c now the "edu-speakers" have gotten involved. I truely felt that this topic was closed w/ the (4) year scholarship? And when I said that whatever she does will be her decision. What part of "her decision" are some readers not gettin"? She is not even sure at this point she will pursue nursing, and we still have folks responding to her choice to follow the BSN vs ADN program? At this point I wish this was the issue at hand. Now my brother's "engineering" ideas pervase. It'll be interesting to see how this all turns out, but in the meantime I have a lot of cardiac drugs to study. Thanks RninMay2005 for stickin' up for us ADN students. A lot of the decision to go to ADN+1 vs BSN rests in the money, and a student's tolerance for non-stop school, and a willingness to append one's self out of the work-world for (4)years. The funniest thing is that some people did not even interpret the "ADN+1" part of my statement. Some people just jumped to the conclusion that I wanted my daughters education to terminate after the (2) yr ADN program, that is really (3) years. I said that I wanted her to take a "Plus 1" approach to this. If nothing else this segment has taught me to listen to the patient. As for me you will find me cruising other links where I can get some practical knowledge. The scholarship created a whole different scenario. The cost of tuition is now removed.

[Traveler]

I have just been following this interesting thread toward the end. What I am doing now is teaching my 9 and 12 year old children a very valuable lesson- get your education completed before you have "life" responsibilities. It makes it very hard to wait. I am an RN and went through a Diploma program which I loved and learned to much to prepare me for nursing. However, this many years down the road I have decided I want to become a nurse practitioner. Now I need to go back to school for my BSN and then my MSN. It is much harder to do this now than when I had just me to look after.

While in nursing school the first time I worked in non-health jobs. After graduating I could not believe how easy it was to find a job and how I wasn't always worried about getting laid off. That is one of the nicest things about nursing. You are always guaranteed a job (it may not be your dream job- but it's work) and you can go many different directions in nursing.

If she has some confusion over MD vs NP- have someone explain to her that the basic part of nursing is to be a holistic healer taking into account each individual. Some docs practice this way, but it is not the way they were trained. The nursing philosophy fits my personality better.

If she obtained her BSN and became a nurse, there are so many areas that she could go into to. Many in direct patient care, many in management, and many in insurance, etc. If not happy in that area, she can go on and get her MSN and become an Advanced Practice Nurse. Teaching is a possibility there as well as patient care on a different level- a doctors level of care. Again, many ways to go.

My parents never sat down with me and said "Do something you love, but also make sure it's something that you can support yourself with." Others may agree, but I think it's pretty good advice and have told my children this over and over.

It is very hard being a parent. You can see them wanting to spread their wings and fly, but they still need to know you are there for them and always will be. Becasue your daughter is so smart and sought after in the way of scholarships, many people will be throwing lots of career advice to her. My advice is, you know her better than anyone and you know where her love and aptitude lie. She may succeed in an engineering program, but would she like the work? Let her bounce ideas off of you, make lists of various options, and help her with her scheduling. My kids cringe when I tell them I'm going to college with them!

I don't know how parents can just turn their kids loose once they go away to college. I think that's when the kids really need the parents advice.