[kellyo]

As a student in my last semester, we are required to do an 8 hour shadowing experience in and area of choice. I chose L&D and was setup w/ an RN by my CNM.

It happened to be a quiet day (which mirrored my L&D clinicals) with a few pts lin early labor, a few c-sections and a few NSTs. A phone call came in from a particular physician's office--18 week twins with ruptured membranes. I immediately thought of my next-door neighbor who who is 18 weeks who is seen at the same office. One of the nurses asks the pts name, and it is my neighbor. My heart sank. This was an IVF pregnancy after several years of infertility.

I met them in the front lobby and assisted her w/check-in while he parked the car. They looked like trains had hit them. She delivered this evening (I asked if they wanted me to stay and the declined--her mom was on her way there to be with them) and they were able to hold the babies (a boy and a girl) for the last few minutes of their tiny lives.

This is my first real experience w/ grief. I'm sad, angry and feel completely helpless and powerless. My heart is aching for them. They are such wonderful people. I've not stopped crying all day. We've been neighbors for 7 1/2 years. They began to shy away when their fertility problems began and it seemed that everyone in the neighborhood was pregnant. They were just starting to come around again. In fact, I had just mentioned to my mom last night that it was so good to see them back to being themselves again.

I just needed to let out some emotion. Thanks for reading

-Kelly

[SarasotaRN2b]

(((((Kelly)))))), just a hug to say I'm sorry.

[RNin2007]

This is so so sad, I am very sorry ='(....
I can only imagine the loss they must feel....and for the babies they so badly wanted. *sigh* Hang in there...

~J

[RNnL&D]

I am so sorry for your neighbor's loss, and for the pain that you feel for them. It is very hard to deal with the loss of a baby, and even more so when you are emotionally attached to the parents. I'm glad that you were there to support them.

[carolinapooh]

I am SO sorry to hear of their loss. I know your thoughts are with them now, but remember to let yourself grieve too. Take care of yourself right now while you’re doing what you can for them.

[SmilingBluEyes]

WOW that is a sad story. I am so sorry for this------and that you have to experience this on such a personal level. Sadly, you will see this story repeated in labor and delivery experiences through the years. It never, ever gets easy, but you learn how to cope. No matter what area of nursing you may chose, sad and sorry situations will come up that rip your heart out.

Again, I am saddened and sickened for these folks. What a tragic, sad loss. It's so unfortunate and unfair----people who are desperate to be good parents have this happen to them----and others who are monsters have children w/o problems. UGH sorry. I don't want to get started there....

Please know my heart goes out to all of you.