[AlaskaKat]

Had a patient that was about 24 weeks pregnant ask to see my Mother/Baby ID badge when I entered the room. I told her it was change of shift and hadn't gotten it yet (I was just answering her call light), and besides, there was no baby for me to steal! She said yeah, but you might knock me out, do a C-Section, and steal my baby...

[at your cervix]

Originally posted by moz
I love the primips who rate their pain as an "8" and are 1 cm.

Everyone thinks that their contractions are a 10, until they meet up with number 11!

[mother/babyRN]

Oh my gosh, those are ALL hilarious stories. Just got an email from a NP friend of mine who actually had a woman tell her she ovulated an egg out of her vagina...Some days it doesn't pay to go into work.

[rdhdnrs]

From a pt who needed a foley "How long do I have to have this capitol in me?" Another: "I'm dilated 2 sinkometers" Also,"My wife is being inducted; when are ya'll going to start that there dioxin?"
From an African American pt "I have ringworm on my shoulder; if I put bleach on it, will my baby turn white?"

[legsmalone]

I had the patient who didn't know she was pregnant have her baby in the toliet, then right after they get her into the ambulance, her roomate (and ex girlfriend of my patients FOB) goes into labor too.
They ended up with rooms next door to each other... thought it was "really cool" they both had their babies on the same day......

[at your cervix]

had a pt come in, i asked her when she was due, she said in february but they are going to induce me in december because i never carry my babies to full term. (well no wonder if we keep inducing you 2 months early!!!!) do people really think that we are that stupid???????????

[legsmalone]

Originally posted by at your cervix
had a pt come in, i asked her when she was due, she said in february but they are going to induce me in december because i never carry my babies to full term. (well no wonder if we keep inducing you 2 months early!!!!) do people really think that we are that stupid???????????

Sometimes, yes.

[OBNURSEHEATHER]

Originally posted by at your cervix
"You don't know your butt from your vagina and YOU are asking ME if I'M sure?"

LMMFAO! This is the best laugh I've had today! Freaking hilarious! Tried to retell the story to hubby... I either left somehting out, or he didn't see the humor, but I'm rolling....

Heather

[OBNURSEHEATHER]

OH GAWD! Babysauce??? Ewwww.....

And AlaskaKat! That's the most drastic attempt at an infant abduction I've ever ehard of!

I haven't laughed this hard in awhile!

Heather

[baseline]

Don't have any OB stories...just crazy ED stories.........I don't do babies.....they're slippery.....