[jazzy163]

We usually have parents (24 hrs)/siblings (young ones has to have somebody looking after them or they can go to the play room, if they get too wild) and grand parents (timed) to visit policy. Anybody else can have a quick peak on the first day and we do enforce that, one at a time. No more than 2 people at the bedside.

[Elvish]

Originally Posted by jazzy163

Tell the nurse manager to handle the situation and no one gets into trouble.

'Cept my manager isn't there at 0300 when I'm dealing with said situation.....

[elizabells]

Originally Posted by Arwen_U

'Cept my manager isn't there at 0300 when I'm dealing with said situation.....

And in some of our cases, the manager just perpetuates the problems in the name of Family Centered Care.

[danissa]

Another situation that makes me go MMMrgh in a different way! Two long term babies, in the same room, one preemie and sick but getting there slowly. The other, with a rare syndrome, very very sick with a DNR. Wee one with the dnr died, and the mother of the other baby in the room never even asked if he had died. She and the other babys parents talked every day in the unit, but its as if she just didnt notice that the other baby had died. Or perhaps chose not to, for fear or something. Just a wee bit strange, parents usually ask if the other baby has gone when they have been around and witnessed what has gone on. Or is she so wrapped up in her own wee world that she just hasn't noticed that the other wee guy isn't there? Human nature, and parental bonds forged in the nICU usually lead to parents having a care what happens to other wee ones too, thats been my experience. Just this time was different.

We are all trying hard to understand this mothers total denial of interest in whats going on around her.
And shes a lovely Mother, really good person, so I would have expected her to say something.

[prmenrs]

Danissa--I think she's choosing to only deal w/what she is able to, the other thing is too painful. I'm sure she has indeed noticed the other baby is gone, and she's probably sad about it. She's just not sharing her feelings.

I don't think it's that strange, really. And we can't talk about pt A w/pt B's parents anyhow. jmho

[2curlygirls]

Seriously, if I get started on this subject, I will never stop.

I find difficult families morbidly fascinating and am often assigned them because I'm *good* at dealing with them. Hoo-freakin'-ray for me @@

I think the best one was when a dad called in a bomb threat shortly after 9/11. Pretty funny dude.

[danissa]

prmenrs...Thanks for your reply. I know we cant talk about other babies, but it happens that parents ask after a death in the nicu.." did wee baby x die?" Being in such close proximity and witnessing daily goings on, if parents ask they need to be told the truth, with no extra details, just a yes or no, so they know what happened. They know we cant and wont go into details, but the loss of one of our wee ones is felt throughout the unit, and other parents are usually aware.

[danissa]

Originally Posted by 2curlygirls

Seriously, if I get started on this subject, I will never stop.

I find difficult families morbidly fascinating and am often assigned them because I'm *good* at dealing with them. Hoo-freakin'-ray for me @@

I think the best one was when a dad called in a bomb threat shortly after 9/11. Pretty funny dude.

OMG.......What a grade A nutter!

And 2curlygirls, .....to you babe, someone has to take them and be good at handling them! Well done on your stamina!!!

[elizabells]

Can someone look out the window and tell me if they see flying pigs? We've just instituted... visiting restrictions.

Yep, folks, we are now open ONLY to parents and grandparents after 8pm. No more overtired/overstimulated 3yo siblings running up and down the hall yanking on IV tubing at midnight! I give it three days before someone starts crying anti-Family Centered Care and we go right back to totally open visits, but it was nice to hear about last night.

[Elvish]

Just had a set of parents recently tell nsg staff (baby is healthy, normal) that their first child died in the early neonatal period...."but we were going to give him up for adoption anyway, so it didn't matter."

I was speechless and just had to walk away.

This coupled with the also-recent parent who bragged that they give their infant child soda in his bottle has made me need to pray a lot more, for the state of this world.