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Posted: Mar 17, 2008 09:42 PM
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I always wanted to be a nurse as far back as I can remember. I know I put splints and bandages on my dolls; Mom told me. I graduated from high school already married with a baby, school was out of the question. Then, my marriage fell apart and I met my next husband and had another baby. I still wanted to be a nurse so badly. My husband laughed at me---"You a nurse, never going to happen". So, then that marriage disolved and there I was with a three year old and a one year old. Yes, I went to school, but not for nursing-the waitng list was 3 semesters and I had kids to raise. I became a lab tech---I finished quick. I could still work in a hospital and help people. But, I still wanted to be a nurse.
The years went by and my sons grew up and so did I. I continued on in the lab and got a BS in lab science. I still wanted to be a nurse but now I was afraid....I can't go to school now, I am in my forties, I am too old! I can't do it...there is no way! So, I stayed in the lab and dreamed of nursing and jealousy watched my nurse friends and wished I could be them.
Then 911 came and all of my nurse friends and nursing students went to help with the recovery. I couldn't go--I wasn't a nurse--they didn't need lab people. I went home and told my husband how much I still wanted to be a nurse. I wanted to be there the next time to help out as a NURSE. He told me, "Honey, if you want to and think you can do it, go on and do it"! He didn't think I would find a school-- BUT I DID!
In Sept of 2002 I started nursing school and I never looked back. It was not easy but it was the best thing I could have done for my self esteem. I finally felt whole. It was a struggle because I worked all day and went to school at night. I graduated on time in May of 2005 with my diploma and ADN. It was one of the best days of my life.
Now I can live my dream on a daily basis because I love being a nurse. I know that I make a difference to my patients and that is the best feeling that there is. Whether I are comforting a child who skinned a knee or helping a family say goodbye to a loved one on their way to glory I make a difference because I am there for them. Sometimes, I am just there to listen to them , share with them, empathize with them. I am there at happy times, sad times, mad times, good and bad times. There are times when you have to be tough with them and sometimes you just have to shrug and not know what to do. Through it all, I am a nurse and it is a calling and a gift. Yes, there are times when I get caught up with trying to fix things that I can't fix or mend broken hearts that stay broken. There are times when I get frustrated to see the same faces over and over and over but I still try to help them chnage for the better and if they can't I just accept them for who they are.
My biggest regret is not going to nursing school sooner; I was afraid to follow and live my dream and it held me back. Now, I dream of teaching nursing in the future and am ready to work on that dream.
If nursing is your dream please follow it because we desperately need you and you will be so very happy to say: yes, I am a nurse.
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