[zoeboboey]

Originally Posted by kathi9

Zoeboboey

Thank you! It helps to know I'm not alone in this.

Peace,

Kathi

You're welcome, but I just realized I didn't address your question about long term care. There are LTC places where the staff does seem to care and do a fairly good job, but for the most part staffing is a JOKE (sorry but it can be ridiculous sometimes what people are expected to do - especially the CNA's) - so my answer to overload has always been to work the night shift. That way I can pace myself more, there are fewer interruptions, fewer emergencies, (and no, people do NOT sleep all night! And with just one nurse there is plenty to do ... contrary to day shift's opinion LOL) - anyway - that way I can do a good job, really focus on the patients that need me, and provide some old fashioned care as well (ie I do help the cna's with bells and bed changes when I can) -

So anyway - I forgot to answer - LTC can be harder for some and easier for others. I LOVE IT because I love my elderly patients

Take care!

[kathi9]

I love older people, too. But the stress of long term care was really enormous.....I wish I could make up my mind if I want to go back or not.

And many thanks again. It's awful to have a mental illness but for some reason..every other job I've applied for since leaving nursing seems to involve the interviewer noticing "blank spots" on my resume (times I couldn't work due to depression) and, wow, do they ever focus upon it. But in nursing, it seemed (as long as it was LTC) they were ready to hire me as soon as I walked in the door.

Peace,

Kathi9

[Angel 3]

Hi everyone, I am soooo glad to find this thread. I have been struggling with mental illnesses my whole life. I didn't know that I even had this problem until after I went off to college the first time. I received my BBA in 02', and now I am finishing up my pre-reqs to get my BSN. I originally went to school the first time to get my nursing degree, but didn't do well in school and had many "issues" that I couldn't cope with on my own. I didn't know what to do, or who to turn to so I tried to hide it. That didn't work. I finished school, and then hit rock bottom. I literally sat in a house by myself for one whole year after school. I had a friend of mine suggest that I go see a therapist. Since then I've been to several different therapists, on many "trial" medications, but I'm still not getting the help I need. I have been mis-diagnosed many times, so I really don't completely know what I have. I do know that I have anxiety disorder, borderline personality disorder, post traumatic stress syndrome, and major depression. Some have told me that I am bipolar, but I've heard so much, that I don't know what to think. I've read up on all of it on the internet, bought books, done just about everything. I was abused my entire life, had no one to turn to and so on...... Now whatever my "illness" is, it's causing problems with my relationship with the one I truely love and will someday soon marry. But I guess I am just trying to figure out what you all do to cope with your illnesses. I am on medication right now, but I just moved to a new city, and I don't have a doctor here yet. Now I have to go through it all over again trying to be diagnosed, get on the right medications, because I'm not right now, and start school August 21st. I'm scared that if they start changing my meds to see which ones work the best, that I might not do good in school. I haven't been in a classroom setting in 4 years, and I do have very bad social anxiety. I know that it's not true, but I feel like there is a big label stuck on my forehead saying I have a mental disorder, and I always feel that I'm being judged or labeled for it. I'm glad to see that there are other people out there strong enough to have control over these mental illnesses and it gives me hope. For a long time I just wanted to GIVE UP completely, but now I know that I am not the only one. Thank all of you for your courage to share your stories, and any suggestions or insight for me would be greatly appreciated. How did you finally find the right meds, doc, therapy, etc? Any advice will help me. Sorry for such a long posting, just needed to get some things off my chest.

[zoeboboey]

Originally Posted by kathi9

I love older people, too. But the stress of long term care was really enormous.....I wish I could make up my mind if I want to go back or not.

And many thanks again. It's awful to have a mental illness but for some reason..every other job I've applied for since leaving nursing seems to involve the interviewer noticing "blank spots" on my resume (times I couldn't work due to depression) and, wow, do they ever focus upon it. But in nursing, it seemed (as long as it was LTC) they were ready to hire me as soon as I walked in the door.

Peace,

Kathi9

Yeah, and I feel awful about lying. So I came up with one thing that was true, "I had been staying home with my son who was having difficulty with school." Well part of that was because I couldn't deal with him AND work, so it wasn't really a lie lol

You could also say you were traveling (if you were manic somewhere in your mind ha ha!)

It IS tough. Now I am applying for non- nursing jobs and I have only had one interview since like March. Sigh.

[zoeboboey]

Originally Posted by Angel 3

I know that it's not true, but I feel like there is a big label stuck on my forehead saying I have a mental disorder, and I always feel that I'm being judged or labeled for it. I'm glad to see that there are other people out there strong enough to have control over these mental illnesses and it gives me hope. For a long time I just wanted to GIVE UP completely, but now I know that I am not the only one. Thank all of you for your courage to share your stories, and any suggestions or insight for me would be greatly appreciated. How did you finally find the right meds, doc, therapy, etc? Any advice will help me. Sorry for such a long posting, just needed to get some things off my chest.

I am encouraged by my counselor that the antedote for the social anxiety is to go somewhere (the mall, grocery store, even for a walk) every day, and try to say hello to someone, like in a cash register line, etc. Exposure ya know? You can tell yourself you are just "familiarizing" yourself with your new area. That way once classes start you won't be starting cold.

As to the right combo, GOOD LUCK and let me know what you figure out, LOL! Takes us many years to find out the right match, I have been in treatment since 85 and just this past January have had a REASONABLE medication regimen.

I bet there are many in school in the same boat as us, but I'd suggest you not tell a lot of people because then you will feel very vulnerable if you get sick down the road. if you can get to a DBSA (depression/bipolar support alliance) support group, it will help you have a safe place to share your concerns!


Of course anything I share on ANY of these threads are my opinion only!

[Angel 3]

Originally Posted by zoeboboey

I am encouraged by my counselor that the antedote for the social anxiety is to go somewhere (the mall, grocery store, even for a walk) every day, and try to say hello to someone, like in a cash register line, etc. Exposure ya know? You can tell yourself you are just "familiarizing" yourself with your new area. That way once classes start you won't be starting cold.

As to the right combo, GOOD LUCK and let me know what you figure out, LOL! Takes us many years to find out the right match, I have been in treatment since 85 and just this past January have had a REASONABLE medication regimen.

I bet there are many in school in the same boat as us, but I'd suggest you not tell a lot of people because then you will feel very vulnerable if you get sick down the road. if you can get to a DBSA (depression/bipolar support alliance) support group, it will help you have a safe place to share your concerns!


Of course anything I share on ANY of these threads are my opinion only!

Thanks, I am looking for some sort of support group right now, along with a therapist. I want to start seeing someone before I start school in case they do put me on some sort of meds that don't "agree" with me. I've had that happen and it wasn't pretty......you can only imagine. I don't disclose my illness to anyone that I go to school with, or even associate every once in a while. I have learned the hard way on that. It will always come back to haunt you in the long run, or someone will easily blaime you for everything because you are an "easy target". That's just been my experience so I keep it to myself as much as possible. I want people to learn who "I" am before they see my illness come out, if it does!!! Thanks for the advice. I can always find comfort in knowing that I am not the only one.

[grace90]

You're definitely not alone. I've been a med-surg nurse for 2 years and I struggle with depression, PTSD and panic attacks. Earlier this year I took 3 weeks off and got some major help. When I got back I expected to be pummelled with questions about my medical leave, but no one really asked questions, just said they were glad I was back. Phew!
I keep my issues to myself and try not to talk about them. At one point I did talk to the other nurses on my floor about it, last year, but then I got in an argument with another nurse and she called me "crazy" among other things, so now I keep my yap shut about it. Some people aren't trustworthy, obviously.
I found my depression has gotten better since I changed my schedule. I was working 5- 8 hour shifts a week but a month ago switched to 3- 12 hour shifts which means I have more nights off and more time with my kids. But that's just me, everybody's different.
Mental illness shouldn't have such a stigma. We don't fault our fellow nurses if they are dealing with hypertension, diabetes or other chronic diseases. So why should it be such a stigma to have a chronic condition like depression or anxiety?

[elizabells]

My favorite thing that happened: I have a little, um, problem with men getting angry. While I was never even spanked by my parents, I did have an abusive boyfriend when I was sixteen. So when men (and occasionally aggressive women) get mad at me, I'm SURE they're going to hit me and I panic. This has even happened with a female boss who was just mad about something really trivial. So once during my first med-surg rotation, I had a slightly demented man get really angry during a bed bath and take a swat at me. My preceptor found me hyperventilating in the storage room, and seeeeeemed really sympathetic at the time. I told her I had a little problem with the violence (hence my decision to go into the NICU), without giving her all the details. I showed up at the next clinical and was assigned to the same patient! She gave him to me for the rest of the rotation. Said I needed to toughen up. In a later rotation I had her again, and caught her regaling another student about the incident. She ACTUALLY said "Oh, you had such a problem with his personality!!!" Um, no. I have a problem with being hit.

[jbhueston]

Thanks, I am looking for some sort of support group right now, along with a therapist. I want to start seeing someone before I start school in case they do put me on some sort of meds that don't "agree" with me. I've had that happen and it wasn't pretty......you can only imagine. I don't disclose my illness to anyone that I go to school with, or even associate every once in a while. I have learned the hard way on that. It will always come back to haunt you in the long run, or someone will easily blaime you for everything because you are an "easy target". That's just been my experience so I keep it to myself as much as possible. I want people to learn who "I" am before they see my illness come out, if it does!!! Thanks for the advice. I can always find comfort in knowing that I am not the only one.__________________

This is a good website that has a support group in areas across the us.

www.dbsalliance.org

[jbhueston]

thanks a lot. i will check out that link. i heard about that book and want to read it. everytime my mom has an crisis it upsets our whole family. its like a pattern that keeps repeating itself. each time she has one, we learn to cope with it better. i dont see her changing, its us that have to change if we want to be a part of her life. we hope she takes her meds and keeps seeing the dr. but in the end if she makes the wrong choices, she will end up getting in trouble (in her mania stage when she doesnt make rational decisions) and running the risk of being put in a mental institution again.

i know this is a hereditary disease. my grandmother had it too. i look at my kids and hope and pray they do not get it. we have looked at our diet too that some say play a part in being bipolar.

and we have found a good support group through, www.dbsalliance.org