[Sabby_NC]

Originally Posted by the princess

thank you all so, so much for all these feedbacks!!!!...i really love myself now, and started thinking positively...i tell you, i was as positive as you, my colleagues, before that accident, and when i was recovering...yes, i'll restart thinking positive again...and i'll do my best to do well at work..i just hope they'll be more accomodating and supportive this time... I NEED THE BREAK!!!! and i tell you, they won't regret hiring me....thank you so much, my colleagues!!!! GOD bless you all....

Hang in there Princess. How are you doing today then eh?

So sorry all this has happened to you but I firmly believe things happen to us for a reason. Grow stronger and learn from this. You are a survivor ok?

[zoeboboey]

Originally Posted by redhotzzz

I ABSOLUTELY love who I am, but just found out last week, after my 36th job interview that was NOT for the ER that I have been in for 37yrs, that I have been tossed in the circular files by these nurse managers because they can't figure out why, all of a sudden, I want to make a career specialty change! I actually had one call me on the phone ONLY because she knew me from an ER when she was the unit secty and I was urging her to keep on going to get her RN!!! She asked me point blank IF or WHAT had happened that would make me want to change to a smaller unit and when I told her (which really I am not OBLIGATED TO UNDER THE LAW) that I had fallen and broken my leg and forearm and had titanium plates and bone grafts in BOTH and no rotator cuff left in my right shoulder....she said, "Oh my God! I will pass your resume on to my Manager right NOW and you will hear from here next week!" IF that had not been a former peer of mine, my resume would have gone to the circular file like all the others have, as you can't tell me that with the nursing shortage as bad as it is, it would take me 36+ interviews to return to work, no matter what different specialty I was wanting. With that much ER experience I can certainly handle Urgent Care or a MDs office and it really isn't anyone's business "that you will be bored here after being an ER RN so long"....I should be able to change specialties whenever I want to....and not be interrogated by ANYONE! I can still work, I just can't do the heavy lifting and pulling and pushing any more....it's ruined everything I have over time.

I hope this works out well for you!

[merry22]

Having been forced to retire with disability I know that theres some truth in making my own self esteem but my entire life my greatest joy and accomplishment and satisfaction has been in nursing. I had to form a new id for myself and accept me without my uniform. Its been hard but I have done it by finding outlets for my nursing needs. Some of us need to be nurses and to others its a job...

[cmc4n6]

Guys...I am here with you. I am embarrassed for the woman who told you it is up to you to get yourself back on track...and like it's somehow your fault. Believe me, from the depths of depression and horror....that is the last thing you should tell someone.

The nursing world (particularly in the hospital) is full of cynical people who think they know it all and are self righteous. When you do one little thing wrong, they're all over you.

I say, you guys in clinical, who think it's your job to label someone who has been off for whatever reason = you should be ashamed of yourselves!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You don't have all the answers.

[zoeboboey]

Originally Posted by cmc4n6

I am embarrassed for the woman who told you it is up to you to get yourself back on track...and like it's somehow your fault. Believe me, from the depths of depression and horror....that is the last thing you should tell someone.

Are you referring to what I said? I'm not sure - but my entire point is - anyone can KICK you down - but can anyone KEEP you down?

If you saw the size of my medical file and employment hx - you would know that i totally empathize.

And, if you weren't referring to my comments, as Emily Latella used to say, "Never mind ..."

[woody62]

Originally Posted by zoeboboey

I guess I should clarify, Woody, it was kind of a generalization that might have put her down, I am sorry. I'm not some Pollyanna who has not experienced reality

..............

[A question, how long have you been disabled? Next year, in November, I will have been disabled for twenty years. One of the few times I have been told I could return to work and that I am stealing from someone's hard earned money, is on another message board back in 1999. And it was by a few of my so called peers. One's value, in todays society, is identified by one's ability to work. I went thru a very severe, long lasting clinical depression, because I couldn't accept that my working days were over. It wasn't my self esteem that was affected, it was my identification of myself. And there is a big difference. I've accepted my disabilities, my change of income, even the change in my standard of living. One goes thru cycles. And that is all I am saying.

Woody

[zoeboboey]

Originally Posted by woody62

One's value, in todays society, is identified by one's ability to work. I went thru a very severe, long lasting clinical depression, because I couldn't accept that my working days were over. It wasn't my self esteem that was affected, it was my identification of myself. And there is a big difference. I've accepted my disabilities, my change of income, even the change in my standard of living. One goes thru cycles. And that is all I am saying.

Woody

I keep falling, and getting back up. Hard to answer straightly. I tried one time to get social security but wasn't awarded (1990). This time I did get it (had a few more hospitalizations, more sporadic work history, etc).

Before that, I would go 2 yrs unable to work, 1 yr, 1 1/2 yrs, etc., or even not working every other month, etc. etc., in other words, chronic problems. Thank God for agency work because at least I could take those long periods of time off when necessary.

So, this time, after going from FT nursing to not being able to do anything for 3 yrs, I started doing 20 hrs a week as a cashier. I recently upped them to 29. Whoo hoo. lol

I have had severe depression/bipolar and sometimes functioning and sometimes not. Usually, sub par functioning. When my illness would affect my nursing judgement and abilities, I would stop for as long as it took to get them back. So far, this time, I haven't been able to get it back. I call it "chemical ECT" - some short in the wiring due to the illness or meds. It's not the usual fogginess of depression or crawling back out of it, there is definitely "something" missing. Not sure if I will get it back!!! But, the future is not any of my business. Tomorrow, God willing, I will wake up and go to work.

Anyway - moot point. I don't want to invalidate your experience. I CAN say that the quote of yours I paraphrased above, word for word, describes my own experience.

{{{{{{{{{{Woody and all}}}}}}}}}