[RNandlovingit]

Sue. I actually took a pay raise coming to hospice. But anyway. I know all about the paperwork!! Now i seem to be having communication issues and learning how to deal with families approriately. I have a tendency to open mouth, insert foot!

[SweetSue16]

Hi Nursegirl, What part of the country are you working? Working with famlies that are in crisis or guilty ( particularly if a grandmom is in a nursing home) can be very difficult. I have found that is not always what say or the way you say it that is the problem. It is the way that family member choose's to hear it. Several month's ago I was met by a drunken son in a nursing home. He accused me of saying hospice would pay for his Mom's new glasses and than reneging on that " promise". The reality of that original conversation with him revolved around her recent hospital stay and NO hospice would not be getting her new glasses. He than threatened to revoke hospice. I called the office and documented exactly what happened. The office was supportive of me. The pt's son did not revoke but he really never spoke to me again. That was ok with me because he was a drunk and kinda of scary. Sue

[nrcnurse]

I love my job too, and like you (and relative to a lot of my co-workers), I have only a few years experience. Hospice offers an opportunity to provide nursing the way you were taught, with patience, caring, and sincerity. However, this is 2008 and nothing is really like we were taught in school. Patients, and families, will lie to you. There are ALWAYS family dynamics. You can't fix everything, and you need to remember that there is an entire team to help you. Use your social worker!! They are invaluable.

You will amass a host of very bizarre stories, so, change the names and plan write a book. The experiences would make great tv, too.

Remember to take care of yourself. Do not " take the patients home with you." Plan your time, and work your plan. Night and weekend triage are available outside regular working hourse, and you don't need to be doing their jobs for them. NEVER give a patient/family your cell phone number. NEVER. Did I mention that patients and families will lie to you? Most often, the patients are pretty straightforward: they have a dx, they accept tx, they appreciate your attention and the services hospice provides. Families have issues, some typical, some bizarre, some dangerous, and some downright criminal. IF you are ever frightened, or get a sense that you could be in danger LEAVE IMMEDIATELY. This may never happen to you, but know that it could, and know that your safety is paramount. There will be many "quirky but safe" incidents. Ex: Pt expires, family wants him dressed in boxers c red fire engines, then asks you to take digital pics of them "kissing him goodbye." These experiences are badges of honor. Welcome to hospice.

Nancy

[OncallRN]

Originally Posted by nrcnurse

There will be many "quirky but safe" incidents. Ex: Pt expires, family wants him dressed in boxers c red fire engines, then asks you to take digital pics of them "kissing him goodbye." These experiences are badges of honor. Welcome to hospice.

Nancy

OK that's a new one to me, but I have dressed a 6ft 4 in man in a suit and tie, because he never left left the house without wearing one.

I've also had extended family almost get into a fist fight, and have yell at them to take it outside as I pronounced the pt. that one I called the FH again after I left to give them a heads up.

I've also come to home where there is a full blown Irish wake going on, ( 20+ people and lots of "spirits")and I still need to pronounce the pt.

I work to respect what is important to people, but sometime I do shake my head on the inside