[YellowFinchFan]

Originally Posted by MLOS

An elaborate penile piercing which I will not describe because it still gives me the willies to think about it.

A McDonalds sausage biscuit sandwich.

$3,000.00+ in $20 bills.

Weapons of all sorts.

Maggots.

Small furry animals, both alive and dead.

[nursetims]

When I worked in interventional radiology, the MRI tech came to get me one day, and was laughing really hard.(WE ALL HAVE THOSE UNPROFESSIONAL MOMENTS AT WORK.) Anyway, this kid came in and said he was having "penis pain" so they did a lower abdominal MRI. Come to find out the kid had part of a wire hanger shoved up his urethra. The tech asked the kid why it was there and the kid said "oh I must have swallowed it". (poor kid) So they sent the kid off to the ER. To make a long story short, we did a little research, and finally the ER docs got back with us. The reason the kid (and supposedly other kids) put wire hangers into their urethras is to recieve instant orgasm. They place the wire hanger up the urethra and let it hit the prostate gland. Then they put a battery on the other end of the wire hanger and some how get an electric shock, which provides stimulation to the prostate gland. ANYWAY!!!!!!!!! I'm just sayin'....LOL!
I APPLAUD YOU KID!

[Blee O'Myacin]

When I was a student, I pulled back a patient's sheet to do my assessment and he had been eating milk duds, and had spilled them all over himself and the bed. Needless to say, I didn't think they were milk duds at first glance. (Who would??)

I found a grocery bag and some newspapers in a patient's butt crack.

And the handful of accidental slip and falls that result in foreign objects like lighbulbs and small electronics getting stuck in rectums.

Blee

[scattycarrot]

Elderly guy presented with a pretty much necrotic penis and scrotum after applying a padlock and being unable to get it off. Quite sad really as they couldn't save his family jewels.
The small furry animal thing.....defo not an urban legend. People are strange!

[grandee3]

I love the Saturday Night Live ER skit (with the guy who always seems to fall or sit on something strange). I'm from Louisiana and can't spell Achfalaya--Achf----oh, what ever. I love the old lady too, always stealing something and telling what she's going to do with it.
I needed a good laugh today, thanks!

[squeakykitty]

Originally Posted by MLOS

Weapons of all sorts.

As for the weapons, I thought it would be somewhat common, at least in some areas. I guess ER nurses have seen all sorts of strange stuff.

[nursetims]

HAHAH! yes! Apalachin ER. Oh that is the BEST skit on SNL ever!

[rentalnurse]

was cathing a lg lady and 2 of us had to hold legs up and out pops a cheeto, guess she was saving it for a snack later

[fireshifter]

How about a Christmas tree ornament in the folds of fat underneath a breast of a lady who had been passed out in her house for several hours. It was in the middle of July in Nebraska and she had no air conditioning. Pretty nasty.

These last three were from when I worked as an EMT in the ER two days a week and the other five days, I worked in a max security prison.

A bic pen stuck in a p*nis, cap-first. The cap fell off when they pulled the pen out and we had to wait around before sending him to surg to see if he could "pee" it out.

A small pistol in a rectum.

An inmate who decided that taking small bits of wood, rolling the bits into balls on the concrete, slicing along the sides of his, um, p*nis, inserting the balls, sewing up the "incision" with dental floss and waiting a week to pull his pants down to show the female lieutenant, saying, "I thought it was a good idea, that the ladies would like it." It was pretty nasty and I saw him in the ER that week after hearing about it at the prison.

Those are the ones that stick out from 7 years ago. Wonder why.

Jen D.

[Anagray]

when I worked on medsurg I cared for a mentally unstable patient who came in with abdominal fistula that "developed" at home p hernia repair. when she went for an abdominal x-ray on the day of admit they found approximately 30 sewing needles that the patient has been sticking inside her abdominal incision after she has been discharged the first time.