[Audreyfay]

You folks are an entirely different breed of nurses. You have my attention, and respect!

[HEDNURSE]

Originally Posted by lvnprntlc

After 6 years...I've seen a lot.
One of the strangest ones was a pencil inserted up the penis.
The inmate had some weird sexual practices to say the least!

THE STATE HAS A GUY IN THE PSYCHE UNIT WHO SHOVES STAPLES SHREDDED MILK CARTONS SHEETS OF PAPER AND EVEN PENS INTO HIS PENIS.......................... WHAT A BUG THIS GUY IS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THEN HE ALSO TRIES TO BRING AN EMPTY COFFEE JAR FULL OF HIS SO CALLED BLOODY STOOL BUT AFTER TAKING SUCH THING YA KNOW THE ONE WITH THE CHERRY FLAVORED SMELL IT TURNS OUT TO BE LOW AND BEHOLD KOOL AID ..................... BUT IT WAS FUN WATCHING A ROOKIE WHOON AND PROVIDE EXTRA TENDER CARE TO THIS SKID LOL TIL SHE WAS INSTRUCTED ON THE NEEDINESS AND ATTENTION SEEKING BEHAVIOR ........... WHAT A FREAKY SKID LOL

[froggygolfrn]

Originally Posted by tiona

El Dorado County. Thanks. T

I worked in both Placer and El Dorado Counties for CFMG.

[skislalom]

I was a corrections officer for a decade....I've got entirely more stories than I have time to share...people will do anything to smuggle in contraband. One of the worst was...I was called to Max - told something happened to the guys hand and they think he slammed it in the door (steel pneumatic door). I arrive to find said inmate with his hand in a cup of cold water...he pulls his hand out and all 4 of his finger are in shreds and scraps. Seems he was just booked in for illegal fireworks/explosives. DUH to the arrest and booking officer. Inmates whom we have no idea what gender officer needs to dress them in, hallucinations...fun of D/T's the worst one we ever had was an ATTORNEY! He was somewhere else for over a week with snakes and beercans on the dock...he sent us all flowers after he sobered up and thanked us for the professional manner in which we dealt with him what ever. Up the rectumsand in vaginal canals...PACKS Of cigarrettes, pill bottles with hype kits and narcs, the bic lighters slide right out..and OMG the piercings...I can't even go into that?!?!?! I've seen compound fractures, lips split so wide that I swear butt cellulite was showing, men raping men, women raping women, meth mouth, mentals with no mental health help, ooops I shot myself before I got arrested (uh...officer who arrested him you MIGHT want to have that checked out before I accept him!) oh the stories...could go on and on...I've never envied the medical department in corrections...people who haven't seen a doctor or dentist in 20 years feel obligated for us to fix them...IYY...I'll shut up now....

~T

[nurseT]

I've decided if you like this job, you must be a little twisted.

Originally Posted by Audreyfay

You folks are an entirely different breed of nurses. You have my attention, and respect!

[estrogen]

No offense, I guess I have an idea why, but it sure seems like you guys are a pretty callaced (sp?) bunch. I have flirted with the idea to go into correctional nrsg, but reading all this makes me think ...nah, maybe not. I kind of want to keep my sense of compassion.

I'm a med surg hospital nurse, dealing with my share of DT's druggies, drunks a jail birds, but I still can't help to feel sorry for them... Like taking care o these unwanted souls for some reason... Am I naive?

[crjnursewarrior]

Originally Posted by estrogen

No offense, I guess I have an idea why, but it sure seems like you guys are a pretty callaced (sp?) bunch. I have flirted with the idea to go into correctional nrsg, but reading all this makes me think ...nah, maybe not. I kind of want to keep my sense of compassion.

I'm a med surg hospital nurse, dealing with my share of DT's druggies, drunks a jail birds, but I still can't help to feel sorry for them... Like taking care o these unwanted souls for some reason... Am I naive?

In answer to your question, no offense, YES you are naive. I have worked in corrections for three and ahalf years...and I say this all the time...the stories that we correctional nurses could tell would fill volumes, but no one would believe them...except other correctional nurses. It is not that we are calloused, we just have developed an affinity for sorting throught the crap to get to the real problems. We are compassionate and caring when the situation calls for it. The simple truth is that there are fewer situations in corrections that call for it. Corrections is a calling. You either sink or swim. Love it or hate it. For those of us who choose to make it our specialty...we love it. We probably could never work in another setting...or would not want to. It is a very stressful job at times. Ninety percent of the time you are on your own...you're making the decisions. But it is NEVER a dull, boring job! And it requires that a person be able to differentiate between a real medical need and a manipulative ploy by a dishonest inmate. I understand that people make mistakes, but you must keep in mind, these people are there because they broke the law...they are NOT honest, harmeless patients like the ones you see on a Med-Surg unit. It is that keen awareness to these facts that allows us to be good correctional nurses and to survive in such a setting. It is also the understanding of the lengths these inamtes will go to deceive you and being aware of those dangers that keeps us alert and safe and allows us to go home after our shift is over. So, like you, we take care of the unwanted souls, but most of them we do not feel sorry for. Most of them are there for a very good reason. However, we are still patient advocates. And it takes a very special nurse to be the advocate of a criminal.

[crjnursewarrior]

Originally Posted by sierranurse

Tell us your most outrageous emergency medical responses within the correctional facility where you work.

I have worked in correctional nursing for three and a half years, so like many of you, I have many stories...I work in a regional jail. We house everything including county sentenced inmates, DOC, feds, even illegal aliens. One thing that sticks out in my mind that someone else had mentioned was the "meth mouth". I was doing an intake screening on a guy who had the nastiest mouth I believe I have EVER seen. He had lesions on his gums that were so NASTY it just looked like maggots were crawling on his gums. If I saw him in a dark alley I would run screaming in horror! I affectionately call him Maggot Mouth...not to his face, of course!
The fake seizures...I could fill a whole chapter...Pattiecake mentioned those...I guess your 1033s are the equivalent of our Signal 95s (medical emergency) you get down there and they are laying in a fetal position with their pillow under their head! And the sternal rub or nailbed thing is a most useful tool! Or I pick up their arm and drop it toward their face...funny how they always manage to move it form hitting their face!And the best one is when the tower officer calls medical and says inmate so-and-so called up to the tower and said he's having a seizure...I say if inmate so-and-so can TELL you he's having a seizure he's NOT having a seizure!
We have about 40 females in our 250-300 inmate population...all I can say is you couldn't pay me enough to work in an all-female facility.
Yes, I do think the inmates think we nurses were born yesterday! And the cops that bring them in half-dead and expect us to accept them must think the same thing!
Oh, and last but not least...probably closest to my most outrageous emergency response...one evening was working all by myself...Signal 95 called during med pass...got down there and found an inmate on the ground. He had history of seizures (real ones) figured he had had one,other inmates were yelling he jumped from the top tier. I said oh no he didn't. Went over to cell door of one of the more reliable sources in the section, he tells me oh yes he did! Climbed over the railing, flipped everyone both middle fingers and yelled "See you in h***, M*****F******!" and jumped! Ended up with a spiral fracture of his right leg....NEVER A DULL MOMENT!!!!

[Hellllllo Nurse]

Originally Posted by crjnursewarrior

In answer to your question, no offense, YES you are naive. I have worked in corrections for three and ahalf years...and I say this all the time...the stories that we correctional nurses could tell would fill volumes, but no one would believe them...except other correctional nurses. It is not that we are calloused, we just have developed an affinity for sorting throught the crap to get to the real problems. We are compassionate and caring when the situation calls for it. The simple truth is that there are fewer situations in corrections that call for it. Corrections is a calling. You either sink or swim. Love it or hate it. For those of us who choose to make it our specialty...we love it. We probably could never work in another setting...or would not want to. It is a very stressful job at times. Ninety percent of the time you are on your own...you're making the decisions. But it is NEVER a dull, boring job! And it requires that a person be able to differentiate between a real medical need and a manipulative ploy by a dishonest inmate. I understand that people make mistakes, but you must keep in mind, these people are there because they broke the law...they are NOT honest, harmeless patients like the ones you see on a Med-Surg unit. It is that keen awareness to these facts that allows us to be good correctional nurses and to survive in such a setting. It is also the understanding of the lengths these inamtes will go to deceive you and being aware of those dangers that keeps us alert and safe and allows us to go home after our shift is over. So, like you, we take care of the unwanted souls, but most of them we do not feel sorry for. Most of them are there for a very good reason. However, we are still patient advocates. And it takes a very special nurse to be the advocate of a criminal.

Excellent post.

[estrogen]

Originally Posted by crjnursewarrior

In answer to your question, no offense, YES you are naive. I have worked in corrections for three and ahalf years...and I say this all the time...the stories that we correctional nurses could tell would fill volumes, but no one would believe them...except other correctional nurses. It is not that we are calloused, we just have developed an affinity for sorting throught the crap to get to the real problems. We are compassionate and caring when the situation calls for it. The simple truth is that there are fewer situations in corrections that call for it. Corrections is a calling. You either sink or swim. Love it or hate it. For those of us who choose to make it our specialty...we love it. We probably could never work in another setting...or would not want to. It is a very stressful job at times. Ninety percent of the time you are on your own...you're making the decisions. But it is NEVER a dull, boring job! And it requires that a person be able to differentiate between a real medical need and a manipulative ploy by a dishonest inmate. I understand that people make mistakes, but you must keep in mind, these people are there because they broke the law...they are NOT honest, harmeless patients like the ones you see on a Med-Surg unit. It is that keen awareness to these facts that allows us to be good correctional nurses and to survive in such a setting. It is also the understanding of the lengths these inamtes will go to deceive you and being aware of those dangers that keeps us alert and safe and allows us to go home after our shift is over. So, like you, we take care of the unwanted souls, but most of them we do not feel sorry for. Most of them are there for a very good reason. However, we are still patient advocates. And it takes a very special nurse to be the advocate of a criminal.

Thanks so much for your reply. Very informative and I totally get your point. Makes sense. I would oppose just one little thing, in Med-Surg, by far not everyone is honest and harmless. We get all kinds of people including the occasional inmate...

Thanks again