Shy nurses - page 2

I am a new graduate nurse I just passed NCLEX-RN a week ago. I am a shy person who is very soft spoken. I am very caring person. However I found that being soft spoken to be a disadvantage. I... Read More

  1. by   MereSanity
    Shyness is NOT a defect! The world does NOT need a bunch of type A's running around....thank God for all the different personality types...I've always thought the type A personality had a defect....loud, in your face, wanting to "win" all the time! Give me a soft spoken, sensitive, quiet (think before you speak) nurse any day! It's OK to work on some assertiveness and the low self esteem...but do NOT try to become a type A if you weren't born that way!
  2. by   Tesfanurse
    I do not like the word shy actually....people refer to me as such. I also do like like the word quiet because I do talk. I prefer the words cautious and calm. When I talk it is because I have very important thing to say or I want to say something that uplifts others.
    I have reached in life this far by being who I am... I will be more confident but I will not change myself. It is unnatural. I have to just concentrate on being the best nurse that I can be.
  3. by   HappyWife77
    Shyness and out right loudness and outspokeness are most definately defects. Something in between the two would be desirable. It's affecting her wanting to apply for a job. It is interefering with her goals....that is a defect.

    Soft spokeness and cautiousness are assets.


    As you know Tesfanurse coming here and talking about it helps tremendously. I wish you the best. Start applying!
  4. by   SE_BSN_RN
    I have a soft voice, too.....because 70% of my trachea is blocked with cartilage. Only way to fix it is to have surgery, and I will not do that. I am always getting people's remarks "Oh, are you sick?" etc, etc. My reply is "No, this is my normal voice. Makes you listen."

    Get out there and apply for jobs! I still consider myself shy but I will stand up for myself and those around me if needed. You didn't get a degree for it to go to waste. No one is going to think twice about your voice if you have the confidence in yourself.
  5. by   akulahawkRN
    Being confident but soft of voice and being shy are two different things. People will be able to tell which type of person you are by how you act because both types of people are "quiet." Just as a zebra can't change it's stripes, you can't change who you are overnight. Nobody can give you confidence in what you do but you. Confidence is something you discover within yourself as you move toward excellence. Until you find it, lack of confidence can be what keeps you from becoming truly excellent.

    You just don't have to be loud and outgoing to be excellent. Indeed, sometimes being loud and outgoing is a cover for lack of confidence. Confidence isn't a voice volume thing.
  6. by   Alfi_srq
    Shyness is not a defect!!! Please read the book Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain. It is so helpful and empowering for those introverts who feel inferior. There is nothing wrong with that. I did learn to compensate for it but it can be so tiring. Please read it. It is an amazing book.
  7. by   littlehoneybee
    It's a common misconception that being shy means you're an introvert, but that is not true. Extroverts can be shy too. Introverts tend to think before they speak, are good observers and analysts, and do not need to be around a large group of people from which to draw their energy. Those traits can be a real asset for a nurse. I am an introvert, but I am not a shy person. Shyness can be overcome, but being an introvert is part of your makeup.
  8. by   kiszi
    Good point. I am and will always be an introvert, but shyness has no place at work for me anymore. Throw me in a baby shower or office party, on the other hand, and I want to hide under the rug! But I digress. The key to confidence as a nurse is knowledge. Study hard and research unfamiliar things you come across. It IS important to project confidence and learn to be assertive with your patients; they, in turn, will be confident that you know what you're doing. I promise it will get easier with time.
  9. by   kaylee.
    Quote from HappyWife77
    Shyness really equals self centeredness. It's a defect that can be overcome thru recognizing it and doing the opposite. Instead of thinking about how you are feeling...redirect your thoughts to the task at hand or others. Which you have it in you...you became a nurse. Congrats! Also do not be so hard on yourself. I have worked with soft spoken nurses...and really liked them and their style of nursing, they were competent and the patients loved them as well. Step out in faith and get a job You will develop your soft skills when using your learned skills. Best wishes! You can do whatever you set your mind to.
    That makes no sense! Being shy has its drawbacks, but also specific good features, such as being aware of those around you, or conscientiousness. Self-centered people are the narcissistic ones who are usually pretty "outgoing" although have no concept of emotional intelligence. Shy people are quiet, but perceptive and thoughtful. Sorry your claim caught me off guard...
  10. by   kaylee.
    Quote from Tesfanurse
    I have learned that having self pride and walking with my head up high is all that it takes to make things easier. i can definitely do this... It is unrealistic to try to change myself. It is actually possible to be soft spoken yet confident.
    Think of it more as growth, rather than changing who u are. When i started i had some major self-confidence issues, but one nurse, who took the time to mentor me, said almost those exact words. He told me to walk tall, and be proud of who i was, and it was something i never forgot. From that day on, i would catch myself and remember those words.
  11. by   Keepitreal123
    It looks like you are doing great- first step you did post here about your shyness. Just apply and see what happens- dont wait. Good luck
  12. by   kaylee.
    Quote from Emergent
    You are NOT defective. Learn to manage your personality type. There's a great book out there 'The Highly Sensitive Person'. This an important trait in 15% of the animal kingdom. It's not as highly valued in our brash Western culture, but nevertheless important to society as a whole
    OMG crazy that you mentioned this book, because after i posted on here 2 months ago, relating to what the OP was going through, i stumbled upon this book randomly, just intrigued by the title, and i was astonished that someone had described my traits so collectively to a tee. I had nothing more to say about these things being complete flaws after i read this...bc there are so many good aspects.

    To those who read this book, you will know pretty quickly if this pertains to you. And things will make a little more sense. (At least they did for me). It was tripping me out that she was describing me word for word at some parts, and to such an accurate and precise degree...
  13. by   FutureResearchRN
    I'm a shy nurse too. I've been shy my entire life and it's something that will never change. But you learn to not be shy at work. It is difficult, but just remember to communicate what needs to be communicated, no matter how "stupid" you may sound (esp with doctors and such). Also, being talkative doesn't make you a better nurse. I've been complimented on being a good/caring nurse for things that dont involve conversation, such as focusing on pt comfort, oral cares, etc. you will figure it out in time.

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