People think I am stupid

[nikkole318]

I am a new nurse who just got off orientation a few weeks ago. I have worked at the hospital where I am for more than a year and was hired from a tech position to a nurse once I passed my boards. I thought everything would go smoothly once I got off orientation, but I've been wrong so far.

During orientation, I managed to make a lot of really stupid mistakes that I should have known better than to make, had numerous personality clashes with a couple of my preceptors, and got on my nurse educator's bad side. I know that people at work talk about me.

I have heard it first hand and get the sense that people do not like me. Although some of it is unwarranted bullying, I realize that some of it is my fault as well. I take the blame because my problems with coworkers seem to follow me wherever I go. I have never had an easy time making friends at work and have always gotten the reputation for being stupid, lazy, etc... I guess what I am asking for is help.

I realize that I can control how I present to other people. I am tired of being "that person." I need some tips on how to better my reputation and gain friends at work. I also need some words of encouragement. There is a girl at work who I know has spoke poorly about me to various people and I feel like as a result, these people now have a very negative opinion of me. I can tell by the knowing looks, sideways glances, and hushed whispers in the hall.

I realize that I cannot control what other adults do, but these things have really put a beating on my self esteem. Any advice on how to not **** other nurses off, how not to look stupid, and how to overcome a bad reputation? Thanks!

[Esme12, ASN, BSN, RN]

I am a new nurse who just got off orientation a few weeks ago. I have worked at the hospital where I am for more than a year and was hired from a tech position to a nurse once I passed my boards. I thought everything would go smoothly once I got off orientation, but I've been wrong so far. During orientation, I managed to make a lot of really stupid mistakes that I should have known better than to make, had numerous personality clashes with a couple of my preceptors, and got on my nurse educator's bad side.

I know that people at work talk about me. I have heard it first hand and get the sense that people do not like me. Although some of it is unwarranted bullying, I realize that some of it is my fault as well. I take the blame because my problems with coworkers seem to follow me wherever I go. I have never had an easy time making friends at work and have always gotten the reputation for being stupid, lazy, etc... I guess what I am asking for is help. I realize that I can control how I present to other people.

I am tired of being "that person." I need some tips on how to better my reputation and gain friends at work. I also need some words of encouragement. There is a girl at work who I know has spoke poorly about me to various people and I feel like as a result, these people now have a very negative opinion of me. I can tell by the knowing looks, sideways glances, and hushed whispers in the hall. I realize that I cannot control what other adults do, but these things have really put a beating on my self esteem. Any advice on how to not **** other nurses off, how not to look stupid, and how to overcome a bad reputation? Thanks!

The first year after graduation is the hardest. School in NO WAY prepares you to be a nurse ....but I think you have already solved your own problem.

problems with coworkers seem to follow me wherever I go. I have never had an easy time making friends at work and have always gotten the reputation for being stupid, lazy, etc...

You need to take a really good, hard, honest look at your self. What are you doing to cause people to think that your are "lazy, stupid etc" If this was only here then I'd say bad co-workers....but you have recognized that this has happened before....so you need to look to you. What behaviors do you have that promote this image.

You need to go to your manager/educator and tell them...you want to change. That you need a chance and guidance to become a better you and a better nurse for them. Set up an action plan....engege them in honest dialogue that you want to be better but need help. But do your part too!!! When you receive criticism or correction....you accept it with grace and poise and take the input gratefully and learn form it.

Maybe look into counseling.....go to your facilities EAP (employee assistance program) and ask to speak to someone. Change you. Take a good hard honest look at yourself....and move forward. Think before you act and ask questions.

One thing that may help you is to acknowledge that you don't know it all.......that you need help. Maybe you need some help with organization. I have several brain sheet that I share for AN members to use.......these may help. I wish you the best.

mtpmedsurg.doc 1 patient float.doc‎

5 pt. shift.doc‎

finalgraduateshiftreport.doc‎

horshiftsheet.doc‎

report sheet.doc‎

day sheet 2 doc.doc

‎critical thinking flow sheet for nursing students

student clinical report sheet for one patient

[RNTC]

Reading your original post, my advice is to not "be that person". You have developed a reputation and you need to improve your practice by being consistent and trustworthy. To do this as a new nurse especially, you need to come to work up to an hour prior to your shift and gather information regarding your assigned patients, i.e. hx, iv, tele, tests, labs, Dr notes, etc. Know your patients thoroughly before you step into the room. You may receive this info in report but with your reputation and being a new nurse you need to be prepare yourself accordingly. The goal is to strengthen your reputation by showing that you are putting in the time. Your coworkers will see improved effort and develop respect for you. If you are not prepared to leave your current position you need to develop an action plan. Being a new nurse is very difficult; you are learning so much information on the job and on the go. The first year is the most difficult you need to be proactive in your approach. Ask lots of questions, you will find your peers respect you for being thorough. Find the coworkers you can trust and develop a bond with them and they may be able to mentor you through this tough time. You can do it!

[CrunchRN, ADN, RN]

You stated that in past jobs people have perceived you as "stupid and lazy". I think if you can gain more insight into why they perceived you that way you will know what behaviors you need to change.

Your a new nurse and mistakes will happen to a point. However, if they are the kind of mistakes that come from just not paying attention then you will have people feeling negatively about you.

Maybe sit down with your preceptors and tell them you need their help to know what things you need to change. They may surprise you. Of course hearing what they say will be tough and you will need to gird yourself to take the information in without letting it devastate your self esteem. And you must not be defensive. Once you go down that road they will not be willing to help at all. Not all the things they bring up will be your fault, but you will have to take a little of that to get to the heart of the matter.

I hope you will be able to do that as I fear if not the pattern will just repeat elsewhere. You seem to have good insight and the desire to change and i wish you well.

[M/B-RN]

If people think you are lazy, it could be because you are not helping others out and/or completing your work. I don't know what you do or don't do but here are some of the things that make me think someone I work with is lazy:

Someone who won't even answer a call light for you when you are very busy.

People who sit around and complain about all the work they have to do, and then fall behind because of all the time they spent complaining.

Nurses who use lame excuses: well I didn't do that b/c there was no order (okay...so call for one?), I wasn't sure if i was supposed to do that or not so I didn't want to mess it up (okay....ask someone or look up the policy)

Just some ideas. We all make mistakes, I left tubing clamped and didn't give an antibiotic before. You are only human, but work very hard at not making mistakes, and don't take it lightly when you do make one, remember that it's people's health and well-being you are dealing with.

[Ntheboat2]

Who is it that thinks you are lazy? The nurses or the techs? I ask because I have been a tech and I'm now a nurse. When I was a tech, I thought a lot of the nurses were lazy (and many of them were) but now that I'm a nurse I've had at least one tech accuse me of being "stuck up and lazy" even though all the nurses praise me for doing a great job. I was mortified when I found out how the tech felt because I swore I would not ever be the "lazy nurse" and if you're like me then you take things like that to heart way more than other people do.

Instead of making a big deal about it and talking about it all the time or going out of my way to be helpful to that tech, I pretty much started distancing myself from her and actually helping her LESS than I did before! It's weird, but our "problems" disappeared. I know nurses who REFUSE to do certain tasks and they get along with the techs. Then, there was me who was always worried about what they were thinking about me if I was sitting at the computer charting for an hour, and go out of my way to do things like take out the trash or wipe down surfaces (tech jobs) and they would call ME lazy. I thought to myself, "What is the difference between me and the nurses who don't have this tension with the techs?" The ONLY difference I found was that the other nurses (even the ones who aren't helpful to the techs at all) didn't let comments bother them! I would be bothered by it, go around asking people what they thought about it/me, and basically obsess over it.

Since you are here posting about people thinking you are "lazy" and consider forgetting to put a sticker on a chart to be a "big mistake" it makes me think that you might worry too much about what people think of you. People actually spend a lot less time thinking about you than you think they do. Then, there are people who feed off drama. If someone sees that being called lazy really bothers you and causes you to do their job for them then they are going to keep calling you lazy. It doesn't matter if you actually are or not! This particular tech I have in mind actually just told me that I'm completely different than I was at first and that she loves me now! I haven't changed anything other than stop bothering to help and stop going around asking people if they thought I was lazy, stuck up, or whatever the dig of the day was. I don't know if that's the case or not...I'm just throwing some ideas out there based on my experience.

Another reason I asked who exactly was calling you lazy is because techs who become nurses often have a hard time transitioning in the role from tech to nurse. Are you focusing too much on things like making sure the room is clean and the ice pitcher is full when you should be paying closer attention when the nurse is hanging fluids or calling the doctor? It was hard for me even during clinicals to watch a tech struggling to keep patients bathed and toileted while I sat at a computer and charted. I was always tempted to jump up and help them even though it might mean I was missing an opportunity to insert a foley or do some other nursing skill/task. Once again, I was worried too much about what other people were thinking of me. Just some food for thought.

[multi10]

Lazy? I switched to agency the day after fulfilling my first year, and no matter where I worked thereafter, the implicit motto (social contract), as far as nurses, was, "No-one sits until everyone sits."

[dlcj]

Stop making stupid mistakes (a COUPLE of times?? How do they know you'll never make that mistake again? You did it more than once already!), stop ******* people off, and think a lot less about your self-esteem than how damn dangerous they think you are, apparently with good reason.

Whoa. Stop right there, GrnTea.

Your first comment: very helpful. Informative, insightful, etc.

The vitriol of your second comment, however, completely undoes the good you did with the first. This new RN has come here, hat in hand, very honest and vulnerable, bravely asking for help and advice. What you offered is basically verbal and emotional abuse.

You know what? What you say MATTERS. The energy you put forth in the world with your intent and your words has an impact.

Seriously, you never made ANY mistakes? From your comments, I am guessing that you have, and that you were even harder on yourself about them than this new RN.

This is more a conduct issue for me than the use of the word *** in an earlier post that offended someone.

Just sayin'.

[Guest372004]

Please help me figure this out. What antibiotic is run at 12.5 ml/hr? I have been doing this job for tons of years and have never seen this. I have never run anything at 12.5 ml/hr. Yes, we will titrate morphine drips for example but antibiotics? If it is 50ml of zozyn it is run in 30 minutes. If 100ml of Zozyn, it is run in one hour. Unless it is a specific special antibiotic which the pharmacist will decide upon rate, or if it is some special circumstance, then please tell me what is run at that odd rate?

[nurseprnRN, BSN, RN]

I guess Stargazer is the only other person besides me here who knows about Zosyn (practically) continuous infusions? They have apparently decided that you don't have to be on it for as long if you run it in this slow manner over 4 hours instead of 100/hr q6 hours. You hook it up to its own primary and Y- it in, like you would potassium.

If you have to run Zosyn at 25/hr for 4 hours, is that patient staying hydrated by that

I did, I said that too!

[rn_abbey]

I piggy back as well, but I've noticed that is a pretty mixed reaction here on the boards. Either way, part of moving to new hostpails is adapting to new practices. You'll get the hang of it!

[BacktotheBeach, ADN, BSN, RN]

Please help me figure this out. What antibiotic is run at 12.5 ml/hr? I have been doing this job for tons of years and have never seen this. I have never run anything at 12.5 ml/hr. Yes, we will titrate morphine drips for example but antibiotics? If it is 50ml of zozyn it is run in 30 minutes. If 100ml of Zozyn, it is run in one hour. Unless it is a specific special antibiotic which the pharmacist will decide upon rate, or if it is some special circumstance, then please tell me what is run at that odd rate?

New guidelines are for Zozyn to run over 4 hours, it has been found to be more effective. We just recently started this timing.

[Beautiful Mind RN]

Hi OP,

I am not a nurse yet, so I cannot help you in the area of giving you advice about your mistakes. I'll leave that to the other nurses in here, even though, I do believe we're being a little -too- obsessive about the antibiotics. I think a few postings to help the OP along will suffice...

As for those who are attacking the OP based on their honesty. Tsk, tsk. Stop with the negativity already! The OP asked for advice, not to be scolded! As I told one person in an earlier forum way back, quit feeding the negativity in the culture of nursing. There is already plenty of that going around! Especially for this OP it seems...

Now, OP in regards to your problem with others, I can relate because of my own personal experience. I worked in a hospital setting as well. The pharmacy inside the hospital is a very small world. Everyone talks about everyone. No matter what. It is the nature of people inside settings such as these. When I first came on board as a Pharmacy Tech at one hospital, I was as green (new) as they come and I got a lot of pushback because of that. Those who I shadowed and taught me, were a mixture of both positive and negative feedback. Despite how social I can be, not EVERYONE liked me. Even those I got along with, still talked about me, nonetheless, because I was the 'newbie'.

It's hard to fit into any circle. However, I learned what I could from them, worked my buns off, and guess what? It paid off. Eventually I got gratitude and respect. Three years later, I had to leave that work, sadly enough to pursue nursing school and they were sad to see me go, even the people I did not get along with, were a little disheartened, because they knew I worked hard and did my job.

That's the key...do your job and work hard. You are there to be a nurse. Sure, you can mingle. But do it as needed. Meaning, be social enough to where you can professionally get along with everyone. And if you have questions...be as kind as you possibly can. You always get more with honey...

Also, if you really feel you need to work on yourself, go to group sessions or therapy. There really is nothing wrong with that. It actually helps to get it all out in the open and get another person's perspective and advice. You might even feel better after, knowing what you need to work on. Then practice on it!

I am sure you will be a good nurse if you really work at it and I wish you nothing but the best!