Not Getting It and Losing Hope (A Vent)

[babysteps25]

I am pretty much just venting like many others on here so if that is boring to you save yourself and click away now!

I am a new grad on a medsurg unit and have been working on my own for a few months. I thought I would start feeling more comfortable but everyday is still a train wreck. When I go home I always think of something I forgot and feel stressed about it all the time. I am constantly thinking about possible mistakes I made. We each get assigned so many patients I don't get how others can get everything done.

I have been snapping at everyone I know outside of work because of built up stress and it has been putting a strain on a lot relationships. At work people act like a new grad has no right to complain so I just pretend everythings OK even if something feels unfair. Many people have been supportive, but there are also some who seemed to hate me as soon as we met. I think of it as a new grad rite of passage that I just have to put up with. I keep telling myself to suck it up and work through it but I don't know how much longer I can last like that.

Thanks for reading, I needed some good venting.

[stRiviNg10]

Hey!

I have also been working on a similar unit (IMC) for one year and I was also a new grad when I started! Don't give up, some days will seem harder than others, but after 2 years if you're still not happy you can take what you've learned and transfer to another floor! Use those around you who are nice and seem to get through their work quickly to help you clean your patients, etc. I know nursing is not easy, but we all start somewhere and we can only go up from here!!! Good Luck!

[Esme12, ASN, BSN, RN]

:hug:....the first year (or two) after graduation is hard. probably one of the hardest things i have ever done. feeling overwhelmed, incompetent, regretting every single moment i spent in school.....knowing full well, that i was a complete moron and my schooling was a waste of time. i thought that, for sure, i would end up in prison fro killing someone long before the year was ended.

i cried all the way home......everyday. i cried all the way to work......everyday. i cried in the bathroom at least once a day, every shift i worked. when i cried in my car, it was the ugly cry.

i couldn't keep up. i couldn't get organized. i couldn't remember a single thing i had learned and i was absorbing nothing........

relax baby steps......take a deep breath in. now let it out. get a kleenex and wipe your eyes....:kiss. for what i'm about to say will shock you.... (not really )

you are perfectly normal!!!!!! yes, that's right ..... normal!

this journey will be one of the harder journey's you'll ever be on and just when you think you need to work at burger king a light bulb will go off. schools no longer prepare the grads for the real world and that is sad for the shock you feel and the reality is almost too much to swallow. you are not alone. you are not the first. you are in good company.

unfortunately the hospital culture right now is not nurturing to their staff right now. with a plethora of nurses for every position they are in the drivers seat, and historically, they will behave poorly and not give any support.

here is my advice. keep on trekking forward. make no major decisions for at least a year for you will have that med surg experience that so many positions look for. stop beating yourself up and realize this will take time.

i think getting organized will help tremendously. i have some brain sheets for you to use and adjust for your needs.

brain sheets.......here are a few.

ntp medsurg.doc 1 patient float.doc‎

5 pt. shift.doc‎

finalgraduateshiftreport.doc‎

horshiftsheet.doc‎

report sheet.doc‎

day sheet 2 doc.doc

‎critical thinking flow sheet for nursing students

student clinical report sheet for one patient

i made some for nursing students and some other an members (daytonite,rip) have made these for others.....adapt them way you want. i hope they help.....it really is going to be ok:hug:

[mom35]

Hi there! I could have wrote that post baby steps. I am six months out on first rn position. It really is HARD!!!! I really know how you feel. But Esme12 gives us excellent words and I hold on to them and face each shift. Before each shift I feel sick, cant sleep, exhaustion, I cry. My nerves are pretty bad! Catch myself falling into a depressed state, but then I stop myself and force upon myself positive affirmations: I am a highly skilled nurse, I have confidence, These words help me to turn negative self-talk into positive thinking and it helps. I never really liked coffee but now I find it helps my mood some. Let's stay positive and knowing that you are not alone in this helps, and you are not alone in this!!