New grad feeling left out - page 4

I quit my first nursing job in med surg due to being mistreated. I was there for almost 8 months and I felt like I was being targeted by some charge nurses. They would yell in the hall, refuse to help me, told the director I... Read More

  1. 2
    Quote from jannymac
    I was hazed at my first job, and when I was a CNA, had a charge nurse who was quite open about her dislike of me because I was thin and she was anything but. That charge nurses are supported in being verbally abusive of you says poor things about your current employer. Dig in your heels, grit your teeth, do things their way and pretend to agree with them (and avoid your charge nurses). and show them what you're really made of - then take that newly gained expertise and confidence elsewhere, where you will be appreciated. Beware of magnet hospitals, though - they tend to practice one-size-fits-all medicine - AND nursing.

    I'm rather skeptical about a claim that someone was picked on because they're just so darned cute. Or beautiful. Or young. Or thin, Usually there's a whole lot more to it than that.
    ♪♫ in my ♥ and KelRN215 like this.

    Get the hottest topics every week!

    Subscribe to our free Nursing Insights newsletter.

  2. 0
    Quote from lovelylady3
    I quit my first nursing job in med surg due to being mistreated.
    I was there for almost 8 months and I felt like I was being targeted by some charge nurses. They would yell in the hall, refuse to help me, told the director I asked too many questions,
    The director said they had all given up hope on me and did not want to help me.


    I had good evals, no write ups. Patients liked me and I suspect
    I was not getting credit for good patient reports. My coworkers seemed to like me. I never made a med error or assesment error. Even the drs complimented me and said i was a great colleague.

    The straw that broke the camels back was a minor paperwork error, in that I forgot to fill out one of the forms which isn't even a part of the actual record! And to be fair, I was not the only nurse responsible for this form! But they acted like I was. My charge had been going thru my chart, found that form and took it right to my director. They called me into the office, berated me and told me all those bad things above. They said i needed to go on a work improvement program because my iv start skills were not good either. I feel like I am about average for a new grad on iv starts. I was in tears, and she told me to put my big girl panties on and deal with it, that this was just a part of nursing.

    I do ask a lot of questions, but that's how I learn. I still have new grad insecurity.
    And I always want to make sure i am doing things right. But I guess they saw it as a sign I was not progressing?


    I feel so discouraged , I see my classmates from nursing school all talking about how much
    They love their jobs and they are friends with co workers on facebook. I never had that at my old job. As I interview for new jobs, how can I tell that a new workplace will be supportive and friendly? I want to have a wworkplace "family" where team work is valued. Many managers will say they are supportive but then they end up the opposite.

    Asking a lot of questions at one week is different from asking a lot of questions at 8 months. At 8 months you should be practicing relatively independently. If you still have to ask questions, they should be questions that demonstrate your critical thinking skills. There's a difference between asking "should I give the Coumadin?" and "my patient's INR is 7, her hemoglobin is dropping and her urine is cherry red. I'm going to hold her Coumadin and call Dr. I'maflamingdonkeybutt to let him know. Do you have anything else you need to talk to him about when he calls back?" I suspect that too many of your questions were of the former type as compared to the latter.

    I'm concerned that you seem to think the failure was on the part of your manager, your charge nurses and your colleagues because they weren't friendly and supportive enough. Please take a good look at your own contributions to the ineffective relationships you had at your job. You may find that you need to make some changes in your learning style or your style of interacting with others -- in order to succeed in a workplace where teamwork is valued, you must be a good team member. It doesn't sound as if you achieved that status in your first job.

    Good luck. I hope you figure things out so that your next job is more successful.

  3. 0
    I never said I was perfect. In fact, I was honest about my weaknesses. When I corrected the misperceptions and jumping to conclusions about how I ask questions, I was then accused of being defensive.

    I am not perfect, but I am also not an idiot. The attrition numbers for nursing speak for themselves. Clearly I am not the only one who feels this way about how many nurses lack professionalism and compassion for other nurses.
  4. 0
    Quote from Ruby Vee

    Asking a lot of questions at one week is different from asking a lot of questions at 8 months. At 8 months you should be practicing relatively independently. If you still have to ask questions, they should be questions that demonstrate your critical thinking skills. There's a difference between asking "should I give the Coumadin?" and "my patient's INR is 7, her hemoglobin is dropping and her urine is cherry red. I'm going to hold her Coumadin and call Dr. I'maflamingdonkeybutt to let him know. Do you have anything else you need to talk to him about when he calls back?" I suspect that too many of your questions were of the former type as compared to the latter.

    I'm concerned that you seem to think the failure was on the part of your manager, your charge nurses and your colleagues because they weren't friendly and supportive enough. Please take a good look at your own contributions to the ineffective relationships you had at your job. You may find that you need to make some changes in your learning style or your style of interacting with others -- in order to succeed in a workplace where teamwork is valued, you must be a good team member. It doesn't sound as if you achieved that status in your first job.

    Good luck. I hope you figure things out so that your next job is more successful.

    You are incorrect about how I ask question sand you are also incorrect about my team player attitude.

    Please explain how the charge nurse behavior was helpful and professional.

    You seem quite accusatory and one sided.
  5. 0
    [QUOTE=lovelylady3;7214736]You are incorrect about how I ask question sand you are also incorrect about my team player attitude.

    Please explain how the charge nurse behavior was helpful and professional.

    You seem quite accusatory and one sided.[/QUOTE

    I'm sorry you don't find my advice helpful. Good luck in your future endeavors.
  6. 2
    Quote from lovelylady3

    You are incorrect about how I ask question sand you are also incorrect about my team player attitude.

    Please explain how the charge nurse behavior was helpful and professional.

    You seem quite accusatory and one sided.
    If you knew anything about the AN community and it's members you would know that Ruby is not the judgmental type. What your response to her has managed to reinforce is that you are not open to constructive criticism, and I would be willing to bet it had something to do with how your coworkers responded to you.
    ♪♫ in my ♥ and KelRN215 like this.
  7. 0
    OP, I don't know you but I had a coworker who, though having been a nurse a year longer than me, was still asking very basic questions of me when she was at the 18 month mark. By the time I left, she still hadn't developed the confidence to function fully independently.

    She was able to get by at that place but would be eaten alive at any place larger.

    If you're getting negative feedback, ask yourself why.

    To me, the title of your post is revealing... "feeling left out?" Honestly, you sound insecure and almost homesick or something.

    Take it or leave it but your career could be hanging in the balance so I'd encourage you to give some real thought to some of the postings here. Maybe your charge and your coworkers and many of the posters here are off base... or maybe you've got some things to address.

    Entirely up to you...


Nursing Jobs in every specialty and state. Visit today and Create Job Alerts, Manage Your Resume, and Apply for Jobs.

A Big Thank You To Our Sponsors
Top