Triage complaints- the good, the bad, and the shocking.

Specialties Emergency

Published

"I was raped by an octopus."

"I have severe, severe, severe, SEVERE, SEVERE cold sores!" (five severes, I counted. And one cold sore visible.)

Discuss.

I get creeped out by the older mother (grandma) grown daughter combo that come in with 'my vigina smells and itches' (that's as written)

That's just an odd mother/daughter outing

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Specializes in Public Health, L&D, NICU.
I get creeped out by the older mother (grandma) grown daughter combo that come in with 'my vigina smells and itches' (that's as written)

That's just an odd mother/daughter outing

Yeah, I usually just go shopping with my mom if we need bonding time. Hmm, this is an avenue I've never explored for ways to spend time with my mom....

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Specializes in Emergency Room.

21 yr old girl: " I have this tugging feeling behind my belly button ever since I had my appendix taken out"

"And how long ago did you have your appendix taken out?"

"7 years ago."

Young healthy 30 yr old female "I have the flu"

"OK, so what made you come in tonight?"

Blank stare. "Because I have the flu. I don't feel well."

Grrr this flu season has been brutal. Don't know why ppl think the flu is a medical emergency.

Psychiatric patient sent from nearby facility: "they gave me too much meds"

I review the paperwork they sent with him. The guy was sent because someone at the facility basically made a med error and have him 2mg of Ativan instead of 1mg. It was over an hour after the fact and there was not a darn thing wrong with him. Very legitimate reason for calling an ambulance and wasting our resources...

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Walking and/or standing "seizures", a pt who attempted to flop like a fish over a siderail while "seizing" then when finished sat up and asked if that was a seizure, when told no attempted to get a description of what a seizure looks like. A guy (not diabetic) who took 3 cc's (not units) of insulin in attempt to kill himself because his girlfriend broke up with him, almost did the job.

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Oh and let's not forget my all time favorite... Medic calls report to charge nurse pt in vtach 180ish charge nurse puts medic on phone with md who gives orders. Pt arrives to ED lidocaine gtt hanging medic states pt slowed down but hasnt converted while pt is being moved over and being put on ED monitor as medic shows md monitor strip from field md states "that's not vtach, that's afib with rvr" I'm like WOW! Still! And that was a few years ago. Lol

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Specializes in Med/surg, Quality & Risk.

Had another guy vomit once in the bathroom at the movie theater. No comorbidities, no other complaints. Vomited once and came in by ambulance. An adult man.

The bolded words say it all.

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Patient c/o chest pain at triage, rushed back by a tech without speaking to RN (to comply with door to EKG times). When we undressed him for EKG and monitor saw that he had a small nail embedded in his upper chest.....pulled out by the MD with pliers. ALWAYS do a brief triage on your "chest pain" patients ;).

Several feet of fly fishing line pt. had inserted into his member....*****!!

"I need STD testing before I leave town again." No primary, and apparently no time left to go to a clinic, ugh!

Just a few I've heard.....many more out there!

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Had a corker last night.

Bad: Asian male presented with stab wound to his leg, asked how the knife stabbed him 'I jump from roof and land on it' ***

Ugly: 3 deaths; DOA, Resp arrest in 84yr old and a hit and run

Good: the best should massage ever

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Specializes in Peri-operative, M/S, ER, SCU.

Haha! We get some great ones in my little ER.

"I just found out my appendix grew back so it's hurting."

(Me)"When was that?"

"Seven years ago."

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Specializes in Emergency.

Wow I had no idea the appendix could regenerate! Live and learn! :banghead:

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Specializes in Under training: Hemodialysis.

Unforgettable...

A 56 year old lady came on day, with a complaint of Difficulty of Breathing, known asthmatic for 10 years.

came in semi-conscious with a face mask on attached to hand pump used to pump air on tires.

suddenly, the relatives say she's dying! Duh! i wonder why, they've been pumping for 4 hours! I don't know if i should laugh or strangle the relative.

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Specializes in ER.
Young healthy 30 yr old female "I have the flu"

"OK, so what made you come in tonight?"

Blank stare. "Because I have the flu. I don't feel well."

Grrr this flu season has been brutal. Don't know why ppl think the flu is a medical emergency.

Our newscasters were horrible last year emphasizing deaths from the flu, and then the government put out ads saying to go right into your PCP if you had flu symptoms, and start the Tamiflu early. So everyone with a sniffle and fever showed up. Can't blame them, since they were told they might die if they waited until they got really sick.

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