Specialties Emergency
Published Jan 6, 2013
"I was raped by an octopus."
"I have severe, severe, severe, SEVERE, SEVERE cold sores!" (five severes, I counted. And one cold sore visible.)
Discuss.
Anna Flaxis, BSN, RN
1 Article; 2,816 Posts
And what was the medical diagnosis? STD or Mental Illness or both?
See post #24.
Flyboy17
112 Posts
5:58 pm by [COLOR=#003366]FlorenceNtheMachine
5:58 pm by [COLOR=#003366]FlorenceNtheMachine A member since Aug '12. FlorenceNtheMachine has 'Goose-Egg' year(s) of nursing experience and specializes in 'Critical Care'. Posts: 53 Likes: 102
Awards:
[COLOR=#003366]Quote from Flyboy17
Haha! I'm going to call the next incompetent cervix I see unstable lady parts.
I guess one could have the unstable lady parts if their Ph is out of whack and have a yeast infection.
meanmaryjean, DNP, RN
7,899 Posts
1) Guy brought in by the police (who were giving him a ride because he was out walking in a blizzard - not because of any criminal activity) who told me "I'm having trouble satisfying my woman".
2) Shrieking woman who had a "chunk of metal" in her thumb (it was an un-stapled staple and was all of one cell layer deep in her thumb.)
3) Same blizzard as above (-80 wind chill) - woman brought her four day old baby in for diaper rash. Took two bus transfers to get to us. Yes, the police drove them home.
OkayOkay, I'll try to get back on track here.
Had a guy drive himself in in V Tach. Drove across town, walked into the lobby, cool as a cucumber. He'd had it before and knew what it was.
Had another guy vomit once in the bathroom at the movie theater. No comorbidities, no other complaints. Vomited once and came in by ambulance. An adult man.
Had a diabetic homeless guy inject himself with a large dose of insulin shortly before walking in through the lobby. He wanted to be admitted to the hospital.
monkeybug
716 Posts
(I worked in L&D, we have our own triage.)
Pregnant woman in by ambulance at 3am. Her arrival was followed very shortly by the arrival of FIVE relatives who drove a private vehicle to follow the ambulance. Pt.'s ambulance ride started over 60 miles away (we are the only hospital with L&D for a huge area). I walked in and said, "So what brings you in tonight?"
"I have a yeast infection."
Did you call your doctor during office hours? Nope. Did you try OTC Monistat? "No, I would have to pay for that." Why the ambulance? "Well, my family was nervous."
I did a wet prep, woke up a very angry doctor, and discharged her home with instructions to get OTC monistat, the doctor refused to write a rx after he heard the story. Yes, of course, Medicaid.
That Guy, BSN, RN, EMT-B
3,421 Posts
"I have a temp of 100 for an hour"
"Have you taken any tylenol or motrin?"
"No thats why I came here"
WHAT!!!!!!!! You are raking in a $1000 bill that you wont pay because you cant afford the $3 it takes to buy OTC tylenol yet you smoke 2 packs a day that = roughly $10.
Nursing destroys my compassion and understanding sometimes.
BCgradnurse, MSN, RN, NP
1,678 Posts
One of my all time favorites was a man brought in around 8 AM with a head lac. He was intoxicated and got in a fight with another guy while attending a "Legs and Eggs" show. Legs and Eggs is a "breakfast" show at a nearby strip club. Who knew?
NurseOnAMotorcycle, ASN, RN
1,066 Posts
Here's mine: Pt comes in with towel to face. While talking, blood pours out of his mouth. His wife found out he was cheating on her and BIT OFF HIS TONGUE during a french kiss! Made the news.
nurse2033, MSN, RN
3 Articles; 2,133 Posts
My invisible Mohawk hurts. Really, no- really.
CherylRNBSN
182 Posts
That link was hysterical!
I have had 2 pts fake seizures in the past 6 months and they were equally hysterical and DETECTABLE!
Keep 'em coming!
So funny!
Hagabel
148 Posts
Tonight:
I have sunburnt feet...seriously.......... healthy person with red legs at 11pm at night in summer
I hurt my foot.......pt has not had a shower in possibly months, drunk and feet so skanky I cold not see anything except dirt and hard skin
Numb lip
Abdo pain X 4 years
The broken little toe after stubbing it who calls an ambulance and brings her kid with her late at night leaving a houseful of people and cars in the driveway.
And the 2 pts in a 100kmh high speed rollover who walked away!!!!!
traumaRUs, MSN, APRN
88 Articles; 21,250 Posts
Ok back to the topic at hand - triage complaints. If you wish to discuss medicaid and/or insurance issues, please start another thread - thanks everyone.