Pt's C/O in the ER (funny) - page 6

What are some funny C/O people have had coming into your triage area? Misspelled words too... We had a lady come in the other night because she ate raw chicken -Claimed she didn't know it was... Read More

  1. by   teeituptom
    Quote from newgrad2004
    Yah and here I thought I was a lil kinky too


    Im too old to be Kinky
  2. by   JWaldron
    All those folks who've got bad bronicals... And then there was the women who had fireballs of the eucharist; the gynie told her so years ago, and now it's really bad. And the one who told us she had 'leaves in my virginia'. She was right - she did. She had replaced an old and broken-down pessary with a potato, andit had begun to sprout.

    The woman who came running into the ER, wearing nothing but her bra, in the winter, saying, "If I die, my mother will kill me".

    The guy who came into the ER by ambulance, with a knife still in his back, who had written a 'confession' on the ambulance trip in that it was self-inflicted so his wife wouldn't 'get in trouble'. Now, just how would you do that? Maybe stick the knife in a door jamb and run backwards like crazy?

    Life can be interesting. I miss the ER

    Savvy
  3. by   kat911
    I had a 15 yo complain that her legs were blue, she was brought in from another hospital by ambulance. She had a full work up at the other place, ultrasound, lab, xrays. They found nothing, so they sent her to us, she insisted. I asked the ususal questions, after looking at her legs, any new jeans(ya know where this is going don't ya!) or bed sheets, no, no nothing like that, oh she feels dizzy and sort of nauseated. I whipped out an alcohol swab and swiped her leg, amazing the blue came off. The doc came in and dc'd her, we had to take her out in a w/c because she was still feeling (?stupid?) weak. I will always remember the guy who called an ambulance to bring him to the ED because he stubbed his toe. And of course the 16yo who was walking naked through the kitchen when she slipped and did the splits, landing on little brothers plastic french fries(McDonalds toy?) And amazingly they went right up her inside her. Of course she couldn't get them out. Her mom swallowed this story hook line and sinker, at least until the nurse confronted her about the probability of that actually happening. Any ever complain of "High Blood" any more? Used to hear that one all the time in the 70's and 80's.
  4. by   Spidey's mom
    Quote from teeituptom
    Had one list police pepper spray as an allergy
    how did he know this
    enquiring minds want to know
    I had a lady come into the ER who had accidently sprayed herself in the face with Bear Repellent, which is essentially pepper spray. She took it along when she ran because there have been reports of mountain lions. Poor thing, her eyes were so red and her face too. Very nice lady but very very embarrassed.

    I'd say just about everyone is allergic to pepper spray. Add that to your list before surgery . .

    steph
  5. by   1savvydiva
    The patients at our ED have to write their own cheif complaint...we have a running sheet of some of the stuff we've seen:

    "cis on ris" (cyst on wrist)
    "burned lip from salt and vinegar tater chips"
    "car wreak"
    "throwing up and its sour"
    "nik and back hurt"
    "my ovary hurts"
    "ingrown toenail" (a sleeping 8-month old child at 3 am)
    "not eating" (again, a sleeping toddler, WTH should the child be eating at 4am?)
    "need blood alcohol"
    "somebody slipped me a mickie"
    "female prollems"
    "sore throache"
    "really bad U.I.T." (who proceeded to tell off the admissions staff saying, "You ain't never had no U.I.T. like this...I'm in pain!" No, I can't say that I have..."
  6. by   RNin92
    Quote from 1savvydiva
    The patients at our ED have to write their own cheif complaint...we have a running sheet of some of the stuff we've seen:

    "cis on ris" (cyst on wrist)
    "burned lip from salt and vinegar tater chips"
    "car wreak"
    "throwing up and its sour"
    "nik and back hurt"
    "my ovary hurts"
    "ingrown toenail" (a sleeping 8-month old child at 3 am)
    "not eating" (again, a sleeping toddler, WTH should the child be eating at 4am?)
    "need blood alcohol"
    "somebody slipped me a mickie"
    "female prollems"
    "sore throache"
    "really bad U.I.T." (who proceeded to tell off the admissions staff saying, "You ain't never had no U.I.T. like this...I'm in pain!" No, I can't say that I have..."
    Ever think of publishing your list?!!?
  7. by   maturner
    50 YO male transvestite comes to the triage window and states that "I am pregnant because its been a long time since my last period." After biting my lip, I suggested that he/she might be menopausal and not to worry. Satisfied with my explanation he actually said "thank you" and walked out the door.
  8. by   RNin92
    Quote from maturner
    50 YO male transvestite comes to the triage window and states that "I am pregnant because its been a long time since my last period." After biting my lip, I suggested that he/she might be menopausal and not to worry. Satisfied with my explanation he actually said "thank you" and walked out the door.
    Oh My God!!!!

    I'm still LOL!!!

  9. by   Nitengale326
    Quote from Pamela_g_c
    when the doc pulled a tampon out of this woman that she had "lost" three days prior. Talk about EEEEEEWWWWWW!
    My eyes were actually watering. Has she never heard of using her fingers to dig it OUT!

    Is there a shudder icon?!

    Never wanting to smell that again,
    Pam
    Worked in an OB/GYN office. Had this girl come in with "foul vaginal odor" Found a GREEN tampon! Asked her when was her last period..."I think 2 weeks ago" Doc was so p.o.'d... he ordered "PCN IM in her A**" Maybe we'll hit a brain cell and get that thing restarted"
  10. by   JWaldron
    Quote from kat911
    I had a 15 yo complain that her legs were blue, she was brought in from another hospital by ambulance. She had a full work up at the other place, ultrasound, lab, xrays. They found nothing, so they sent her to us, she insisted. I asked the ususal questions, after looking at her legs, any new jeans(ya know where this is going don't ya!) or bed sheets, no, no nothing like that, oh she feels dizzy and sort of nauseated. I whipped out an alcohol swab and swiped her leg, amazing the blue came off. The doc came in and dc'd her, we had to take her out in a w/c because she was still feeling (?stupid?) weak. I will always remember the guy who called an ambulance to bring him to the ED because he stubbed his toe. And of course the 16yo who was walking naked through the kitchen when she slipped and did the splits, landing on little brothers plastic french fries(McDonalds toy?) And amazingly they went right up her inside her. Of course she couldn't get them out. Her mom swallowed this story hook line and sinker, at least until the nurse confronted her about the probability of that actually happening. Any ever complain of "High Blood" any more? Used to hear that one all the time in the 70's and 80's.

    I don't work in the ED any more, so I'm not as current w/ the most recent variety of DX, but we had a lot of high blood, sugar blood, people who 'just fell out, I don' know what happen, she just fell out", folks wanting to check to see if they 'got roaches of the liver, 'cause if I do, it's too late, an' if I don' it's to early' to stop drinking; the guy who regularly called for the ambulance for abd. pain, but whould get up off the gurney as it rolled through the door and got to vending machines to get a sandwich,and then be mad as h**l when the ambulance wouldn't take him home, because he'd spent all his $. And the folks who would bring in the rat that bit them in a greasy dunkin donuts bag...

    Savvy
  11. by   teeituptom
    I had a 23 yo Blonde female come in last night
    chief complaint her Tongue was Black

    And it was also

    All due to Pepto Bismal

    The Bismuth turns black at times when ingested
  12. by   RNin92
    Every time I go to work I am reminded that I have eternal job security!

    There will always be very stupid people in the world seeking help for the wrong affliction. It's ok though, it's hard to cure stupid.
  13. by   JWaldron
    Quote from RNin92
    Every time I go to work I am reminded that I have eternal job security!

    There will always be very stupid people in the world seeking help for the wrong affliction. It's ok though, it's hard to cure stupid.
    We had a standard diagnosis in our ER: SAS - Subacute Stupididty Syndrome. (It becomes acute when it kills you!) Also DSS - Dying Swan Syndrome, which I see on the floors too.

    Savvy

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