Dealing with "ER" attitudes

[happystudent, RN]

Hey........

I had a rough night tonight......I got into a "discussion" with one of the nurses. She was giving me attitude all evening over little things, yaknow? I have been ignoring this nurse for the longest time because I just didnt want to get into it....

So tonight was the straw that broke the camels back.... I approached her and said can we talk, she complied and I asked her why does she have such a bad attitude with me? She begins to go off on me saying that I alway give her an 'attitude' when she asks me to do something....blah..blah..

So I said okay, for instance? she became very vague at this point. then she says a few weeks ago when we worked a trauma together she said I got in her way while she was getting a BP on the pt. (which I was not aware of because you know how a trauma is...everyone is doing their job all at the same time) So I said to her.. why didnt you tell me that I was in your way? she said she told "resource" about it...(resource never said anything to me:rolleyes: ) Now mind you, when I talk to someone, I use alot of body language.....apparently she took great offense to that and insisted that I was giving her attitude! ahhhhhhrrrggg..

cant win...

so what up with people like that? should I continue to ignore her? I hate ignoring peole because it make it seem like I have an attitude... I already tried talking 2 her.....didnt work, so whats next?

[huggietoes]

While I am sorry for the conflict you are going through, I wonder why you generalize and title your post ER attitude? I personally work in the ER and bend over backwards to be considerate of others, sometimes at my own expense. There are bad apples everywhere, believe me I have worked with them and I got to say maybe my facility is the exception to the rule, however, the ER nurses have been wonderful and taken me under their wing, while when I work on the floors I get it up the yin yang!

[happystudent, RN]

huggietoes,

I guess Iwas generalizing because i work there and the Er is all I know right now........About a handful of people in "my" Er have REAL BAD ATTITUDES. It just so happened she And I are Having personality clashes...........just bites, yaknow? I just want to work in an enviornment with no Petty issues.............

[bluesky, BSN, RN]

Well that's pretty darned petty, to call resource over something that small. I once did something very similar (approached a nurse congenially and privately about an issue) and boy she blew her stack and the whole intervention backfired. My conclusion after working ER 5 years as a unit secretary and watching everybody else is that there are some pretty insensitive types in the ER and I should either get used to it and build a thick skin or find another place to work. Unfortunately the petty people aren't changing anytime soon . I am glad you didn't escalate and counter-resource her or develop clique warfare. It's always hard to take the moral high road when people are attacking you but YOU did it.

My husband is a total type A/OCD-like trauma nurse whom I often overhear confronting people and being really whiny. I can tell you that 99.9 % of the time it's cause he's a perfectionist shmuck who's had a bad day-

Big Hugs cuz it hurts being attacked even if you know it's totally unjustified.

Lexie

[wandernsoul]

"I just want to work in an enviornment with no Petty issues............. "

Huggietoes,

Please call me when you find this heavenly place!!

[wandernsoul]

Oops, that response was meant for Happystudent, not Huggietoes. Must have more coffee........

[happystudent, RN]

thanks guys.....keep the positve thoughts coming.......wandernsoul......as soon as I find this place, You will be the second to know.......

[Scis]

What the heck is "resource"? In the ER I work we do not have such an entity, is this the ultimate complaintant? Just wondering. From being an ER RN in various insitutitions over the past 10 years, I have met some pretty tough personalities. It's the nature of the beast and what keeps most people chugging along in this specialty. Many of our encounters with patients, families, etc. require a tough exterior, and many ER types tend to appear difficult to those not used to frequenting amongst them. Some of the toughest, "mean-natured" individuals I have met are those that I would trust with my life and that of my family. You can't judge a book by it's cover, nor from infrequent encounters. Give 'em a chance!

[Rapheal]

Originally posted by happystudent

thanks guys.....keep the positve thoughts coming.......wandernsoul......as soon as I find this place, You will be the second to know.......

Don't forget to tell me (jumping up and down waving my hands)My bags are packed and I'm ready to go at a moments' notice. I will be bring Mai tais and party hats.

[healingtouchRN]

'tudes are everywhere, ED, ICU's....you name it. One must protect oneself & try not to engage this person. Sounds futile.

[ainz]

The "insensitivity" that appears to be common (especially, and perhaps almost exclusively to the outsider) in specialty areas like ER and critical care seems to abound. I started my nursing career in the ER and I never really noticed it while I was working there. After I explored some other areas of nursing and then went back to the ER after a few years, WOW!! I didn't realize how difficult the staff could be. It really does seem to be the nature of the beast, and, not everyone that works in these areas develops the "thick, insensitive" skin and they seem to do just fine. Perhaps it's the exposure to high anxiety and difficult situations that makes nurses and doctors react and become insensitive, rude, and sometimes just plain old mean.

My suggestion would be to focus on yourself and be the kind of person you want to be regardless of what anyone else is doing. Eventually they will get to know you and leave you alone as you will become accepted, especially if you are a good nurse and do your share of the work!! Good luck finding a place that has nurses that does not experience "pettiness."