24 Things ER Nurses Know All Too Well

#? Don’t bring your ten children (ages ranging 2 to 19) with you & your husband (who skinned his knee) to run freely around the waiting room playing bubble gum wars & rolling on the floor! Don’t you know the floor is a refugee camp for microbes?


While shaving my elderly STEMI pts very hairy chest, his wife asked, “I don’t mean to bother you, but can you get his back too?” Is that funny?



Disclaimer: The information presented in this thread is considered to be a fictitious &/or exaggerated representation of personal experiences with humorous intent (unless otherwise noted). Please be advised that it may be too intense for some readers. Not recommended for children. Any liabilities of economic, moral, physic, psychic para-psychic, paternal, maternal or every other nature is NOT my responsibility, so don't say you were not warned. No cruelty to animals or disrespect for religious, racial, social, asocial, sexual or asexual or minorities was ever intended (by anyone). If you find ANYTHING offending or politically incorrect on this page, it's purely a product of your own imagination and NOT put there by me, but my long-lost identical twin brother of whom I might need to warn you. Any material on this page, except the before mentioned, is solely copyright by myself. All rights reserved. Any possible copying in every form onto any medium, electronic or non-electronic, is strictly prohibited. Commercial or non-commercial use NOT allowed. Enter at your own risk. Batteries not included. Do not read while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment. For entertainment purposes only. If condition persists, consult your primary care physician: not the ED physician. Reader assumes full responsibility. Caution, coffee is served HOT. No animals were harmed in the preparation of this page. Objects in mirror may be closer than they appear. Contents under pressure. Do not intentionally inhale vapors. There are no vending machines here. This article does not reflect the thoughts or opinions of either myself, my company, my friends, or my dog. Listen to your mom. Eat your veggies. Avoid eating prions. Wear your seatbelt. Use car seats for children. Don’t drink and drive. Don't take candy from strangers... or strange people... or anyone else. If something offends you, lighten up, get a life and move on. This list was current at the time of my shift. Terms are subject to change without notice. All decisions are final! This supersedes all previous notices. Disclaimer does not cover misuse, accident, lightning, flood, tornado, tsunami, volcanic eruption, earthquake, hurricanes, or other acts of God, neglect, damage from improper use, incorrect art line placement, unauthorized visitors, unauthorized repair, improper installation, typos, broken defibrillators, antenna or marred cabinet, missing or altered serial killers, electromagnetic radiation from nuclear blasts, sonic boom vibrations, customer adjustments that are not covered in this list, and incidents owing to an airplane crash, ship sinking or taking on water, motor vehicle crashing, dropping the item, falling rocks, leaky roof, broken glass, disk failure, accidental file deletions, mud slides, forest fire, hitting of a deer, milk coming out of your nose due to laughing while drinking, or projectiles, which can include, but are not limited to, arrows, bullet shots, BBs, shrapnel, lasers, napalm, torpedoes, emissions of X-rays, Alpha, Beta and Gamma rays, knives, stones, fecal vomit, etc. Keep cool; process promptly. Subject to change without notice. Sanitized for your protection. This disclaimer may not be copied or reproduced in any form without the expressed written consent of whoever I stole it from.

I found this to be rude.

... the cigs and cellphone are so true... We have a mom who have a 6 mo. old baby with water intoxication because she has been feeding the baby since that morning with water... she told us she had nowhere to go for help because her medicaid has been cut off and lalala dadada...

then, her phone rang.. it was the google phone that was launched not even 6 months before that incident happened... the phone + the monthly bill that might cost few bucks short of a hundred... and she was telling us that she doesn't have money...

I felt bad for the baby really... she was so weak when we received her from EMT... is it the system gone wrong or the parenting???

I want to know how you make the violin!