"Foreign objects in body cavities" - page 10

This is how they present in triage. You note that they appear anxious, possibly in a bit of pain, sometimes they are very matter of fact. We've all seen em. Retained foreign object in various... Read More

  1. by   ernurse2244
    guy came in two nights ago...admitted up front to having a foreign body in rectum. even brought a duplicate of the glass cylinder bottle, rounded at presenting end, capped at the other end. he was using the one in his rectum to push in his hemorrhoids and somehow it ended up well up in the descending colon...off to surgery for him. he was very disgruntled when he had to call his wife and explain he was going to surgery instead of coming home.
  2. by   Diamond Nurse
    I feel compelled to share the story of a guy in a nursing home, (curtain pulled) who I heard making some odd noise, upon looking in I found him to be inserting an artificial long stem red rose, stem end first into his urinary meatus. My initial response was "What the hell are you doing?" then I composed myself and told him that could cause injury and for his safty could he please put the rose into the plastic bag in his trash basket. I saved the offending item and also removed the other artificial flowers from his bedside. The doctor didn't want to see the Rose in question but I showed him anyway, and it won the patient a free 3 day stay in our local hospital's psyche ward!!!
    Later that afternoon I noticed a housekeeper taking home the other artificial flowers from the med room garbage where I had deposited them. And...yes I told her she prolly didn't want them for her crafts and why. Of course that was before the days of HIPPA!
    Last edit by Diamond Nurse on Jun 26, '04
  3. by   Diamond Nurse
    another time I had an abdominal cellulitis whose breasts had to be at least FFF size (she weighed in at >350lbs) a male nurse was going to change the dressings and bedpillows under those hooters and came out looking rather scared he asked me to go in and see what I thought was growing there and much to my suprise she had an eight inch submarine sandwich tucked neatly under her left breast. She pleaded for me not to take it as she was [insert heavy German accent] "saving that for later darling"......
  4. by   TraumaInTheSlot
    2...
    not one.....
    but two....

    albuterol inhalers up the wazoo
    Last edit by TraumaInTheSlot on Jun 30, '04
  5. by   nycegyrl
    There is a lady that I worked with that had to go to ER because her and her dog were "stuck". The dog started clawing and biting her so she couldn't get away and had to call ambulance. She is forever referred to as the "dog Lady".

    I watch Jacka** on TV. One of the guys puts a little matchbox car up his rectum and goes to different emergency rooms to get X-Rays and get reactions. All of the doctors and nurses were very caring and didn't show any reaction of laughing or anger. They were all very professional. I got the biggest kick out of it.

    I have enjoyed the posts. Very entertaining. What one person doesn't think of another one will.
  6. by   hipab4hands
    We are told to use the patient's exact words--
    " I have a plastic bag in my butt."
    when we document.

    I always wondered if this was the patient's way of trying to save money by not buying condoms

    Didn't get to see the discharge instruction though.
    Last edit by hipab4hands on Jul 2, '04 : Reason: spacing error
  7. by   stevierae
    [QUOTE=Snowy]
    Quote from ang75
    ........ Went to put a foley in and there were roaches in her labial folds!!!!!!!! ..........
    QUOTE]

    :stone :uhoh21: Sick and wrong!! I was at a fast food resturant once and the patron in front of me was a very unkept girl who had flys (dozens of them) flying in and out of her shorts and all around her. It was all I could do to politely walk out and go eat somewhere else... very gross

    Eeewwwwwww!!!!! That means--think about it----there were probably MAGGOTS in there, as well!!!!! The flies buzzing about were probably newly matured and escaping their prison--or taking their first solo flights and trying to get back in!!!
  8. by   eph432girl
    Quote from ang75
    ok, so this one is not about a fb, but close enough.

    very, very dirty lol came in by ems, escorted by hus, for "just not right".
    it was very obvious by both appearance and aroma that neither of them could care for selves or each other any longer. ems tells us that roaches were all over the house and were now all over their truck. nice!
    well, lol was altered, febrile and not at all mobile and very large. went to put a foley in and there were roaches in her labial folds!!!!!!!!
    frickin nasty! if i ever get to the point that i have any kind of rodent/pest farm anywhere even near my body that will be my breaking point. dip me in some clorox and put me in a home.
    omg - that is sooooooooooo nastry. the green, slimy, cottage-cheese vaginal culture swabs used to bother me, but i'm over that now. after 10 years in the lab, everytime i see trich in a wet prep i still start itching all over - those things make my skin crawl, but hey, at least they are micrscopic!!!! i pray that i never see a cockroach (notice the singular cockroach) in someone's hoochie! that lil mental picture about made me hurl. nursing school starts in 6 months... what am i getting myself into ????

    yuck... imagine that you are sitting down to eat your pizza and watch a little tv and then you see the new commercial for terminex -- kills household roaches/ants and now try our new vaginal creme formula for your private pest problems ...... :imbar
  9. by   eak16
    yuck... imagine that you are sitting down to eat your pizza and watch a little tv and then you see the new commercial for terminex -- kills household roaches/ants and now try our new vaginal creme formula for your private pest problems ...... :imbar
    [/quote]



    eeeewwwwwww!!!!!!!
    haven't seen any of these patients yet myself, but while in nursing school, i did have a rommate's boyfriend ask -at the dinner table- if i thought he could fit a marble up his urethra.
    not the big knuckle marbles he clarified, but just a usual one....
    the odd thing is, it didn't seem like a sexual thing, he was just a curious guy.
    my roommate slapped him
  10. by   eph432girl
    pain in arse...yea, no kidding!
    goes to xray...
    fb found in rectum (nooooo?????)
    too high up for removal in er (thank god!)
    has to go to surgery...sorry or friends!
    his response...is that where it went?!!?


    in all honosty -- i am thinking that these seemingly innocent household items (ketchup bottles, coke bottles, toilet plungers, fruit, etc) should come with a warning label on them like cigarettes...

    warning from the surgeon general: if object gets stuck up your a$$ and you could die. maintain a distance of at least 3 feet away from any idiot's bu++h0le. do not store near slippery bathtubs and place dangerous phallic household items above waist level when mopping the kitchen floor neked!

    maybe even a nice little public service announcement on the tv every now and then.

    lol -- my abs hurt from laughing so hard!
  11. by   fotografe
    Ok this was my own near tragedy. I was cleaning, and had turned a wooden barstool upside down on the bottom stair. I have a safety gate at the bottom of the stairs to keep my 2 y/o out. I often just climb over instead of opening it cause he is quick and often sneaks in there before i get it closed. On the way back down I was swinging my leg over the gate, lost my balance and very narrowly escaped getting one of the legs of the barstool in a bad place. All I could think of were the stories in this post and how the ER staff would just shake their heads in disbelief as I recounted the circumstances. Suffice to say nothing projectile-like will remain at the bottom of my stairs!

    PS
    I wanted to add that I was NOT naked at the time!
    Last edit by fotografe on Oct 23, '04
  12. by   walnuttree91
    Te best one I heard was a gay man c/o "object in rectum". When the doc opened him, light hit the doc in the eye - the end of a penlight that was turned on!
  13. by   timewood
    Quote from SWFlorida
    But at least her farts are minty fresh.....

    :chuckle :chuckle :chuckle :chuckle

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