need support

I am an RN but am at my whits end with my daughter. She has PDD and Oral-Facial-Digital Syndrome Type I (OFD). The OFD has been a challenge, but one that I have been able to handle without much difficulty - the PDD is another story.

She is 14 and now in foster care, this time probably permanently. She has become very aggressive and violent on more than one occaision. We have been working with social services for a couple of years and have tried everything. She was in foster care, treatment foster care and then a residential facility for 8 months.

She did very well in the residential facility and came home in June. She had not had a violent or aggressive episode in several months and had learned some really wonderful coping skills. I took 30 days of Family Medical Leave when she came home to help with the transition, but it only took 12 days for her to become violent again.

It was basically hell for several weeks. My other children are afraid of her but love her. My husband and I are at a loss and we are once again walking on egg shells waiting for her to blow.

Anyway, long story short, she is back in foster care and probably permanently. I would like to find some sort of on-line support or information on other families in this situation. I know I am not alone, but I don't know how to find other like me. I have practical questions about taxes and child support and questions about how to rebuild my and my kids relationship with her.

I figured if anyone could help, the allnurses bunch would be able to point me in the right direction.

Thanks, Heather