Deaf Parent Concern

Sign language is offered at our local colleges as a language requirement alternative. I think this is great!! It is a beautiful language.

My daughter was fasinated w/ sign at an early age - less than 2 - found a self teach book at home and taught herself sign language. She loves to find others who can use it so she can hone her skills - she is 9 now.

Good luck!
SJ

Exactly. The world and experience of the late-deafened adult is totally different from that of Deaf culture, most members of which are raised as Deaf culture children. A few late-deafened adults join the Deaf community, but very few.

Karen (kea6783, the OP) also said that she knows very little about her boyfriends actual hearing loss and prognosis. That is essential information needed for making any plans. For example, perhaps he would be a good candidate for a choclear inplant should he become profoundly deaf and therefore never need sign language.

When I first lost 60% of my hearing (very suddenly, over the span of about 10 seconds one day) ... my reaction was similar to Karen's. I considered learning sign language in case I might find it useful in old age ... I worried about losing the rest of my hearing, etc. However, as I got comfortable with my new hearing level, those issues became less pressing to me. I have noticed the same phenomenon with new members of the online group I belong to for late-deafened adults. In the beginning, people are a bit panic-stricken and anxious to make specific plans. As they get more experience with hearing loss, it becomes less of a crisis. They mellow out a bit and learn to take this one day at a time. It sounds as if Karen's boyfriend Zach may be in this state of acceptance common in people who have dealt successfully with their hearing loss for some time.

Medical science and technology is progressing rapidly and no one knows for sure what options will be avaible for Zach and me when we get older and perhaps face a future with less hearing. When I need more assistance, I will investigate the possibilities at that time and make the choice that is right for me. That's a healthy approach to a disability and it sounds as if it may be the one Zach is taking. In fact, it might be psychologically important for Zach to NOT learn sign language -- to maintain his cultural identity as a "hearie." One aspect of successfully living with a disability is to accept yourself as you are and to be happy with that -- as opposed to focused on trying to "fix it" and or be overly worried about the future.

I don't mean to be critical of Karen at all with this post. Her questions about learning sign language are a normal response to a normal concern about the future. But Zach sounds pretty normal and healthy too as a person living with a hearing impairment -- maintaining his cultural identity as a hearing person and taking it one day at a time -- having enough trust in himself and in Karen to have confidence that they will be able to handle whatever comes, with whatever medical/technological help will be available at that time.

As in my earlier post, I encourage Karen to respect Zach's wishes regarding the sign language issue (either way) and include him in the decision-making. Also ... to remember that late-deafened adults are very different from the culturally Deaf.

Good luck,
llg

Reading lips has been brought up, but I don't really think he does that. I only know a little about the deaf community and such, but I think his hearing is good enough that he doesn't depend on lips. Just as long as you're not covering your mouth and facing him he can understand. I wish I knew the specifics of his hearing loss so I could explain better.

You might be surprised at just how much lip reading he is doing. Even he himself might not be aware. Your statement about not covering your mouth and facing him sounds a lot like what lip readers need. I have a slight hearing loss in the higher range where female conversation tends to be and occasionally it gets worse if I am battling allergies or some other kind of congestion. I found out how much I have learned to watch the speaker's lips when I couldn't wear my glasses one day and didn't "hear" as well. I don't read lips per se--that is, I can't turn the sound off the TV and know totally what's going on--but apparently I do use lip reading to supplement what I hear. I think this happens often with people who undergo a gradual transformation. The ability to read lips increases just as gradually and the person may not even be aware that they are developing this compensation.

Re; baby sign language. Way cool idea. Very tiny kids in our family (under a year) have been able to tell their moms they were tired or hungry or needed a diaper change. Sign died out when words took over but it was
adorable and useful while it lasted.

Miranda

I realized how much I depended on speech reading one evening in a restaurant. When I removed my glasses to be able to read the menu better, I suddenly couldn't understand what people were saying. It was funny ... going back and forth, back and forth ... as I had the choice between reading and hearing. I have since gotten tri-focals so that I can read in my glasses.

It's called "speech reading" ... what we hard of hearing people do that combines a little lip reading with patial hearing.

There is also something called "cued speech," which is what some families of late-deafened adults do. It's a lot easier to learn than ASL (American Sign Language) and can often be learned in just a few weeks. That makes it more acceptable to families and co-workers. Different hand shapes are used by the speaker to cue the listener in on the sounds that are hardest to read on the lips. The easy-to-read sounds are not cued. As the person speaks he/she uses these hand cues to help the lip reader. So the deaf person reads the lips, but with a little visual help.

llg

Learning sign language is a great idea! Why not take a class together?

By the way, have you heard of the "Signing Time" videos? Our 9 month son watches & loves them. It's a great way to teach sign to kids.

http://www.signingtime.com/

Hello,
I started teaching myself sign language from 4th grade until 12th grade, and then took some private lessons in the community in the summer time at the local recreation place.
I taught myself by just buying the books, and going over and over it from the beginning. I also got from the library vhs tapes with little red riding hood, ect so that i could see the language in action. I practiced with my friends a lot too, and taught them.
My advice......if your s.o. is interested, and you dont want to commit to a class because of time, ect. go on ebay. look under sign language. there are tons of books, dictionaries, phrase books, videos to learn, even a video series to learn from. Plus there are kid video's too in sign. It makes it so easy to learn. And to be quite honest, it is a very easy language to understand. A lot of the signs look/act just like the object you are signing.

As far as kids go......I've got 2....a 2 1/2 yr. old, and one that is 15 months old. I started the kids early with sign language, just because i learned it, and the research shows that it is really benefecial. There isnt any "lag time" with language, in fact they learn to talk quicker, and understand a lot more than their counterparts. Plus, the comprehension of language, and just in general is far greater than not learning the language. The effects are seen well into grade school. It has to do with spacial skills, ect.
Personally, it's cute to see them use some signs together or with me.
I think you'll find as you learn and use it,....it becomes addictive.
Check out this website:signwithme.com
plus check out google.com for info and websites about baby signs or online sign language courses or dictionaries. The internet is chock full of stuff

Good luck!