Thanks Trauma - you got it!!
The original posters didn't see fit to try to tell me how to raise my children - it's too late anyhow, I'm 57 yo, and my kids are all grown anyhow!
I'm not very sympathetic to 'whining' as the one poster stated, but as a mother, the underwear thing had me going - as it turned out he got out that day anyhow. I guess I figure that 'you do the crime, you do the time'.
But this particular place has such a bad reputation for being filthy, and treating inmates badly, and racism, which is driving me up the wall. It shouldn't be a cupcake to be there, but there should be minimum standards.
As a mother, I never did let them use the old 'blame' game. And this boy knew that the only person that was responsible for his being there was HIM.